Mum always angry with me.. am 36!

[moulesvinrouge]

Since I can remember, my mum has had the foulest temper and I worry so much I am going to go the same way. My parents got divorced when I was 7 and my father didn't want to stay in touch with me. My mum is so angry and used to hit me up until I was 14 or 15. Now she gets so angry at me for any perceived slight, such as her forgetting I was going on holiday and being angry at me for not phoning her. Today I had her screaming on the phone that I am never to call her again. She is angry at the world and vile about people for no reason. That said she can be lovely at times and is my only family. How do I deal with this, make our relationship work properly and not turn out bitter at the world like her?

Hey just wanted to add that my Dad is very similar to your Mum - and its not easy to walk away, especially when they are reliant on you.

My Dad is in a care home. Even though we are a fairly large family I am the ONLY member of the family that visits him(5 children, lots of GC). Everybody else has given up on him.I take him out, bring him hot cooked meals ("you didn't cook this!"), buy his clothes ("take them back I don't want them") and visit him as often as time permits ("oh so you managed to drag yourself here?").

Does he ever ask about me or my life? Does he ever even ask how I am? NO. I just get a list of all the things I haven't done or can't do properly!

My siblings whom may see him once every 6 months for half hour get the praise for taking the time out of their busy lives to see him and 'look after him'.

After one particular phone call pretty much telling me what a bad, lazy parent I was and I decided I needed to distance myself from him for the sake of ME, my DD and DP. And that has helped some.

So why do I feel so guilty at abandoning him?

Thanks everyone for your responses. It's so hard isn't it to hear someone you love called that but I know it's true. I just wish I had another family member to be supportive, I've felt for years like it's just me, being a rubbish daugher, not being caring enough, being selfish, being wrapped up in myself. I just wish there was someone to dilute it.

Can understand that OP. My brother thinks my mum is bloody lovely, my dad is useless and I don't really have anyone else.