I suppose like many stories this has a back story - will give it briefly, don't want to bore you!
Sister has a problem with alcohol, started drinking early and then secretively in the house she rents with her little one. Hiding bottles etc.
She's always been a spendthrift. Wearing the best clothes, shoes, hair styles, going to the best places, this combined with the drinking cost a lot of mmoney and she never had any spare.
Then she met some guy who was a bankrupt and the two of them together were dynamite. Their spending went MAD. Together they spent thousands on shite. They had an awful relationship, ea, dv...I couldn't wait for her to get out of it. Thankfully that happened but not before she'd racked up a shed load of debt - borrowing of everyone, not paying bills, rent etc. She took 1000 (sorry, no pound sign) from mum to buy a couch as hers was broken and spent it on a fish tank (I know) and got, somehow, finance for the couch.
Now this was about 16 months ago. Since then she's got rid of the guy, the massive car they bought on finance with mum as guarantor, the fish tank ha ha! I don't think he gave her all the money he owed, but did give her some.
She then met a lovel guy after a few months off the rails, drinking and general bad behaviour.
Recently she took off for a few days with my DN - it all got too much and we were all worried that she was going to do something terrible, you read about it don't you? Anyway, despite mum being proper poorly (and she's NEVER sick) she was in such a bad state mentally she didn't think of anything, or anyone. Mum only knew she'd gone when she went as usual to pick up DN from school as she always does and sister rang her to tell her DN wouldn't be there.
She was persuaded to come home after a few days and it all came out.
There were loans from everyone, mum, me, friends, mum's friends, payday loans (she has a job), a loan shark down the road...and the outstanding debt - about 3500 worth. Then came the big one - she had mum's internet account details and was regularly trnsferring money into her own account. This took ALL of mum's money and took her into the red.
Between my aunt and I we have been able to send enough money to clear the debts and put mum back into the black. Mum doesn't have much in the way of outgoings but she doesn't earn if she doesn't work and she's been too poorly to work recently.
So my sister has obviously been suffering mentally, drinking again, not sleeping, losing weight, being a truly horrid person - honestly, unbearable to be around, ratty, short, etc. She's never there for my children, we always have DN whenever we can despite me knowing that sis is taking advantage, I don't care as it means I can spend time with DN - we live far away.
She's all about the guy she's with at whenever moment and mum and I are the world's worse...it's always our fault whenever there's a falling out (which is rare between sis and I, but mum and her to rub up the wrong way).
So, the crux is mum is a pragmatic soul and has worked with sis through the more important debts and they're onto credit union etc re her remaining debt and future financing etc. Mum has forgiven her and is moving on despite sis taking c.7000 from her over 2 years or so we think, she's doing, I suppose what she has to do - forgive, help and move on. She wants the money back, but that's never going to happen, let's be honest. She's cut her lose if it wasn't for DN.
Now at first I was sympathetic to sis. I know the mental trauma she must have been going through. But then I think how fucking dare she take everything mum has. Mum gives her all she needs, she does all child care for the little one, feeds them both...
I think back over all the shit she bought over the years and the way of life she was living, like a fucking WAG wannabe and I'm sick. I'm sick of the way she treated us during this little fraudulant period of her life.
I tried to see her last weekend and I could barely look at her. I want to throttle her. I so thought things would change this time, but a few little indicators from that weekend suggest perhaps not, she's just paid lip service to us.
I could kill her for stealing all mum's money that she worked SO SO hard for so she could live the high life. How dare she?
I know I have to get over it as mum is and I must take my lead from her and of course there's DN who I love as much as my own littlies. But I honestly can't look her in the eye. I think it's in case she sees the hatred in my own.
I don't even know what I'm asking you. Sorry this is so long and dull. I'm at a loss really.