Just for a bit of background, my mum died 20 years ago, DHs mum died 38years ago. I talk about my mum regularly, not in a morbid way but just so the DC get a sense of what she was like IYSWIM. DH very seldom tralks about his mum, certainly not about her personality, or any quirks she had. If he does mention her it is the fact she is no longer here and how sad it makes him. But it is literally a once a year mention.
So, the other night DD (7) was upstairs with DH and (I don't know exactly how the conversation started, neither DH nor DD can tell me) but it ended with DD crying hysterically because she got confused that DHs mum was dead, she made a remark that she was still alive. DH went mad at her, telling her how hurtful it was to say such a thing and how thoughtless she was. He came downstairs and sat in the lounge saying how thoughtless DD was and how sad he now was.
What would you have said to both of them?