Am I being unreasonable?

[Teansympathy]

Okay so DP goes to visit his ex and kids , did not phone me last night he said he would, phones this morning early with the excuse his battery died, BUT he stayed at EX,s house on the sofa, and helped chop her trees down all day yesterday , he doesnt even cut my grass!, he is all lovely dovey saying he will be home later and apologises for not phoning , am I being unreasonable to feel really annoyed and pissed at him for this?????

A job came up near where he lives , with a house , but i would have been doing all the work he wanted to be a handyman, so we could be together i like a fool fell for it went for the interview , but have woken up to the fact i would be working every hour under the sun and he would not be , as he has his own job of course , so he would have been staying with me on a part-time basis , as he could not have given up his responsibilites and his house could he???, what part of MUG am i missing his motive was for himself even though i do not want to admit it i knowit is true.

Thanks to you all for listening this Sunday morning i feel such a fool and old fool.

I hate to make you feel even worse but from your last post I am wondering if his ex actually knows she's his ex. He's 'staying with you on a part-time basis'? He won't give up his house? Erm, he sounds still married to me.

You would be a fool to keep putting up with it, and a fool if you let the relationship develop further. At least you are still in a position to end it without the complications of selling a house etc.

Solidgoldbrass, sorry no he has his own house and his ex has her own house lived apart for 10 years. He was wanting to keep his house , and I would have rented out mine , that is why i was so sucked in by the idea , as it would help finacially and helped my daughter who is going to Uni in October this year.

I wouldn't move into his other house, the one needing all the revovations muggins you would end up doing, unless it were put into joint names with you. that would be a great chance to see his intentions - are you the lvoe of his life and possibly wife number 2 or are you someone from whom to get free DIY.

Yes I agree he did ask me to move in to his house at the start but no way as I would end up doing his DIY , he wanted me to buy a house near him so he could do up his house an live with me at the same time, it aint happening , i ask myself what have i got myself invovled in?, need to think what i am going to do , but no i do not think i am the LOVE of his life or ever will be , should wake up really shouldnt i?.

You're not a fool, you've realised after just 18 months that this isn't what you want - foolish would be battering yourself up against a situation in the belief that you're better off with a shit man than independant

Yes, agree with that purple.

If you have told him how you feel the only thing to do is sack off, in a perfectly friendly manner, with no beating yourself up a relationship which is not working for you and breezily move forward with your life!

It's OK to walk away from a relationship. It's not compulsory to have a Man In Your Life. If this relationship isn't working for you, bin him and move on. That's a far, far better and healthier option than 'working on it' which always translates as a woman tying herself up in knots to please a man who's not actually that bothered about her but comfy enough with her not to dump her just yet.

I hear you all and thanks for the honesty and solidarity , yea I am independent have been for 21 years raised a kid work full-time, you just think at this stage in life abit of happiness would have been so lovely , but reality bites I need to move on , and with a happy smile!

Am I being thick? If his phone was flat and he stayed at hers all night how was it charged by 8am?

If he had a charger there 10 - 15 mins would have been long enough to charge and send you a text, he didn't have to wait all night.

Nope Xales you aint being thick this is what the man said AND expected me to beleive it , as he knew I did not like him staying with his ex , I thought we had moved on from there apparently not, his days are numbered, the only bummer is we are supposed to be going on holiday together in 4 weeks time , bummer i canny do it now .

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Make sure the booking's in your name and change his ticket to the name of a friend and forget to give him his money back

Good advice but he booked with his Visa in his name at the time so I am snookered but thanks for the help purple.

Then you merely refuse to give him any dosh, citing his unreasonable behaviour in deliberately destroying your trust in him