Ninja cloak

[porridgelover]

I have name changed to ask this. Hang out here and on special needs etc etc

My emotionally/verbally/financially abusive ex-H takes our children for access every second weekend and changes it to suit himself
Some time ago he gave our ASD son his 'old' I-phone that he wasn't using. No SIM card but had put some games DS likes on it.
A while later, I was fiddling with it (to download a book onto it for him). I came across loads of links in the phone history.....to BDSM websites, porn sites, escort agencies and to a site called Ninja Cloak.
From what I can see, its used to hide your IP addess to avoid spam and hackers spying your online activity.
My question is this:- could ex be using it to 'look over my shoulder'when I am online? He has the password for the Wi-Fi in my home. He is very geeky and before he left he had told me of one occasion where he had traced someone on a professional chat board to find out their RL identity.
If this is the wrong board, please tell me- I had a search but couldnt figure out where to ask this.

Yes- I already discussed with him the inappropriateness of letting our child have something with links like this on it; but TBH he will ignore anything I say.......

I don't think he can access your PC remotely but, as a general precaution against hacking, change all your passwords regularly and make sure your virus protection/firewall software is up to date.

Thanks for the quick answer......I do have pretty much everything password protected (though not changed often).
But could he be ''looking'' at where I vist? e.g. figuring out my MN identity and seeing what I say/ask? Not paranoid- I know what he is capable of and theres little that he isn't

The reason for updating your firewall/virus protection is to try to avoid having Trojan Horses or similar malicious files 'reading' information from your computer. For things like your MN identity, he would need your username and your password. If you tend to use the same passwords/nicknames on multiple sites and/or you choose obvious words that are easily guessed, he could potentially hack you. That's why it's important to invent complex passwords and change them frequently.

Tracing someone's IP address from a message board or an e-mail is far easier than trying to remotely log into someone else's computer. That's how the police trace paedophiles etc.

There are programs which will do this, but it's more likely IMO that the ninja cloak site was him trying to hide the other things that he'd been looking at.

If you have virus software it might be worth looking in it to check if any exceptions/allowed programmes have been put in which you don't know about, but other than this virus software would pick up any keyloggers or hacking software.

The other way to do it would be if he'd put something on your computer which would enable him to access it remotely - XP always used to install VNC on my laptop so that he could access his work computer but I knew this also meant he could access my laptop from work! So every time he had finished using it I used to go into Add/Remove programs and take it off.

So, it's worth looking through add/remove programs (Windows XP) or change/remove programes (windows 7) to see if there's anything on the list you don't recognise, if so, google the programme name before removing it (just in case it's a graphics card driver or something!)

If you have a Mac, sync the iphone and restore it to the factory settings.
You might have to update the software again, but it should be clean.
Save the games first, or download them again

If you don't know how to get into your wireless router, google "ip address login Sky router" or BT or whatever it is. There will be an IP address, eg 192.168.0.1, to type into your address bar (where it currently says ^www.mumsnet.com/Talk/relationships/1486447-Ninja-cloak^ ) then instructions on changing your user password and admin password. Change both. You will need to tell your devices the new user password when they try to connect to your wireless.

IP cloaking is not used for spying, it's mostly used for getting into websites that have blocked you People also use it to try and get around website blocks set up by their school, college or workplace.

As others have said, resetting your devices will clear off any old shit but also stuff you wanted. First of all, change your passwords and make sure your anti-virus is up to date and free of exceptions. Clear the history and cache off the phone. You should be good to go :)

If you're worried about him spying on you remotely change all passwords, including your wifi. Then enable private browsing and install HTTPS Everywhere on your browser. Ensure antivirus/firewall/anti-malware is up to date and run a scan with either MBAM or Spybot.

If you have one of those remote access programs then remove it or change the password.

You can sync an iphone with a windows computer too, you just need to download itunes first.

Wow thank you all for your detailed replies. I am not remotely techy so it will take me a while to work through all of the steps you have recommended like changing the WiFi password (seems obvious when you say it).
Mainly its relief that he cant (or shouldn't) be able to read me when I log on here inane drivel mostly anyway!

But I am right to be paranoid- he had a tracker on my car, CCTV hooked to internet for remote viewing etc etc

Something you can check for now then - where your keyboard plugs into the computer, does it plug straight in or does it go into a small grey cylindrical object between the cable and the computer? That's what a physical keylogger looks like (according to a website I found)

he really went for it, didn't he? Poor you!

As Bertie says, do check for small objects added to the wires going into your computers and phones. If you've got about £40 to spare, you can buy new peripherals and at least swap your phone wire for a new one. If you've got £150 on top of that, you could get a tech person to come over and check out your computer. You can also ask BT to come and check your phone connection, but I don't know what they charge for that. Or don't use your landline. Get a new mobile and use that.

Since you've now shown what a nutter he is: I wasn't going to mention this before, for fear of causing paranoia. There are widgets that turn mobile phones into covert recorders. They come in both software and hardware versions, are very cheap and work great. Since said nutter has given DS a used phone, I'd be suspicious of it. Resetting it to factory will get rid of any spy software, but not a hardware one which your ex sounds capable of installing. The only way to be sure a mobile isn't recording (and transmitting) is to take the battery out. Sorry.

You can't take the battery out of an iphone, which is helpful.

Garlic do you know if getting the phone blocked would prevent it from transmitting?

Wow, you can't take the battery out?!

What do you mean by blocked? ... it doesn't have to use the owner's phone account to transmit. I think the spy uses another account on the same network, though haven't delved into it.

I installed a software one on my Android out of curiosity - the same developer does an iphone one. It worked perfectly, you can't tell the phone's even on. It was free!!

How weird.

If a phone is blocked it means that any sim card you put in it will be useless as it won't be able to access a signal, but I don't know if it is the same as the signal being blocked. I'd have to check one next time we get one in at work to see if it could still make an emergency call (something most phones can do even without a sim card). Essentially a blocked iPhone is a very expensive iPod touch. Usually phones get blocked if they are reported lost or stolen, or sometimes if you stop paying a contract, but they can be blocked for other reasons as well. It is possible to get a phone unblocked, e.g. if you found it again and you could prove that you were the owner. Some networks will block the phone but only on their network, so you could use another network (although this doesn't tend to happen for iphones).

I wonder if you put the phone in airplane mode (prevents any transmission) whether that would block it too.

And yeah, the cases are solid so the battery can't be removed unless you send it off to Apple themselves.

Here's one of the apps. Look at what they do! (They're all much of a muchness, the difference is probably in the Web service provided.)

Mini-mobile technology is so good these days, it's hardly worth worrying about whether you're being listened to or watched. This is just one page of the stuff available. There is loads. If you want to have secret conversations, you're best off having them in a very crowded place or out on a moor somewhere, with none of your personal belongings on you.

You can open an iphone; the instructions are on the interweb. You wouldn't want to be doing it on a regular basis, though, it looks like a hassle.

Sorry garlic and bertie....was out of reach with PC today but thanks for the info.
No grey cylinder thing, I use a laptop so only physical attachments are the power cable- wifi internet and printer.
Garlic- those links are scary- I had no idea stuff could be so easily hidden to monitor someone (other than serious terror suspects and then only by government) . I feel that he wouldnt do that (but history has proved me wrong before).
YY the iphone is basically being used as an expensive ipod. It's in a cupboard as it does DS no good at all to sit using screen devices (behaviour/temper/anxiety much worse). So I severely limit his time on it.
I think you've both reassured me that he isnt monitoring me online...it's almost 3 years since he left, so you would think he has found something better to focus on but unfortunately no I must be punished for driving him from his home, interfering in his relationship with his kids etc etc

Sounds like you lost yourself a good'un there Hope he stays lost and recedes gradually into the distance, fading to a blurred memory.

Good to hear the iphone is in no position to undermine you. As for the rest - as long as you observe proper computer security (which you must do anyway; there are worse threats to your bank account, etc, than your ex) there's no real need to worry. Well, not unless you're a part-time drug runner or something

Ah garlic I wish I could delete him from my files permanently.
However [insert geeky joke re he's part of the operating system/ has system administrator privileges] with 2 kids he will land on my doorstep for the foreseeable future.
Thanks to here I have recognised what an appallingly bullying man he is..one of the worst.

Me....I am white as the driven snow