I am really worried about my mum who is in her late 60s. She has always been a bit "difficult" and can be very moody and rude, but over the last few weeks she has been particularly bad. I think she is suffering from depression, at the least, and she admits that she is but she will not go to the doctor. She goes on ADs over the winter as she says she has SAD, but to be honest I think it is more than that. But she flatly refuses to take ADs in the spring and summer.
She has some health worries - nothing life threatening but she may have to give up driving. She says her life is not worth living if she can't drive. She is also having a hard time over some family troubles which me and my children have been through, but we are able to put this behind us and move on whereas my mother is not. She is also having some financial trouble, but then again, that is not uncommon at the moment, but she is having to make some changes to her lifestyle that she does not like.
She is driving away her long-term partner with her behaviour and I too find it very difficult to be with her as she is so angry and rude. She sees many conversations as an attack on herself even if the subject has nothing to do with her. She falls out with the children too and has a lot of difficulty with them as again she interprets everything as cheekiness or rudeness and makes things worse by how she deals with them. She has also fallen out with all three of her sisters.
She is a religious person but says that over the last three months she has lost her faith. She just seems to be spiralling down but will not accept any help or comfort and takes no joy in anything. I try and support her and listen to her but she is so angry and bitter against everyone and everything that it is difficult.
I suspect that she is drinking too much in the evenings but I daren't talk to her about this! But people have told me about weird, probably drunken, phone calls she has made to them and that is worrying too as other people are starting to talk. I have also heard comments about her behaviour when she is out and how she treats her partner in public. She is well-known and respected in the town and she would be devastated to know that there is gossip about her.
I just don't know what to do to help her. I have been thinking of phoning either the doctor or the vicar and asking them if they can help at all, but I don't know if they would do this and it feels wrong to be going behind her back. But I know that things can't carry on like this and she is doing a lot of damage to her relationship with her partner and the rest of the family.
What can I do? Any suggestions gratefully received.