friend lied and so upset

[liesitshorrid]

hi i asked my friend if she would like to go to the zoo with me and our children and she said she would call the next day.....i called her the next day and she told me that she had forgotten about
her husbands relatives coming down and they wanted to see her dd.....fair enough, no objections at all with that....we still went to the zoo as planned, so no one upset by that......
however....since found out that that excuse was a load of cobblers.....why would she lie to me, if she simply did not fancy it she knows me well enough to say ok, i was still going regardless.

our relationship has been differwent lately, no arguments at all, just not seen her, i invite her round to mine loads and she makes her excuses...truth or not, she never ever has invited me round to hers, i always call her she very rarely calls me.

is this relationship of very close friendship doomed.....would you say something to her.....trouble is i hate lies with a passion and i know her very well and she would come up with more to cover her story.

so how would you put it, dont want to sound like she has to explain herself every time...do ya know what i mean???

I have had times when I have just felt a bit overwhelmed, and want a bit of time away from friendships - nothing hurtful in it, just want to be by myself for a while. But yes, I have found myself making up excuses for why I can't do this or that because I feel mean - I have no reason for suddenly not wanting to see people, it just comes over me, and I don't want to offend them.

It all settles back eventually.

Not that that helps much, just trying to give the other side of things - the lying wouldn't have been to hurt you, more so that you didn't feel hurt that she didn't want to come.

just feel I am clutching to hold friendship together....should i ket it lie.....i feel deeply for her and her dd....i watched her come into the world ffs!!! SORRY!

feel its me doing all the ground work.

Take a back seat for a while and see what happens .

agree with the taking the back seat for awhile
just let her come to you now
I find it odd why you never go there yet seen her dd come into the world
could she be embarrassed/ ashamed of where she lives or of her partner

My friends never come to my house... they are all very domesticated and have clean tidy houses, and mine is a state. Although they all say that it doesn't matter and they wouldn't judge, I am not comfortable enough to have them round, so again, I can understand that point.

How long has it been going on? I would suggest leaving it a week or two, and see what happens from there.

she doesn't want to see you .. back off and give her a break and you'll probably get back together in a few weeks or so

sometimes you just need a breather tbh

we were inseperable and her dh wasnt available for birth so its a natural thing that i stepped in.....she has no family as such!!!

so she had dd and had to adjust..like we do and its been the past few months that things have changed....her dd is nearly 2!

will back off.

agree with others - wait a little bit before contacting her again. The zoo thing could just have been that she couldn't afford it but didn't want to say.