Have just left EA relationship and overwhelmed about next steps -can anyone help please?

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I'm a long time lurker but have been reading EA threads for years and gaining strength. I have just left and am in a refuge. My head is completely screwed up. I can't go back, would lose children if I did, but I am struggling. I feel like I've made all this up, can't beleive my life has been like this for so long. I am also worried I will be found on here. I know how strong some of you have been and you have made me face up to things for my children and given me hope of a happy life but I am still so scared. Any words of wisdom? How do I deal with the headfucking?!

I'm surprised that you have been advised not to apply for a non-mol as it's fairly standard practice in these situations for injunctions to be granted to victims of dv.

If he's left the marital home talk to your solicitor about obtaining an occupation order which will give you the right to live in the property until it's sold or otherwise disposed of and, more importantly, will give you the legal right to determine who can occupy it with you.

It may be that he'll attempt to move back in but if you have an occupation order the police will have the power to remove him at your request. If he makes repeated attempts or becomes threatening, you'll have grounds for a non-mol.

However, it may be that you don't or won't feel able to face him down in which case you're best advised to move from the refuge into a property that is solely in your name - albeit that you may find yourself having to call on the police should he fetch up on your new doorstep.