Has anyone applied for divorce for reasons of behaviour?

[keepingupwiththejoneses]

As we are not separated and neither of us has been unfaithful that is the only reason I can apply for. There has been a lot of EA and FA right through our marriage.
My solicitor has asked me to come up with 4 or 5 instances of his bad behaviour. The problem is I just can't think straight. He has messed with my head so much I am just not sure what is reasonable or not! The other problem is that although he has never been physical with me, I am scared of him and what he will do!

Finally - two separate issues there Council who instruct baliffs after one warning letter = twats, H who threatens and verbally abuses Keeping because of said baliffs = arsehole. Not deflecting anything

Keeping - you're doing well, really well under the circumstances. You've got a lot of different things to pull together all under the shadow of your twat of an H. It will get better and one day (hopefully soon) you'll be free of him - just keep hold of that thought x

Thanks Cash. He says he is going at the end of the week and to be honest I think he actually will do as he has been at his dads sorting out the bedroom for the last 2 days

Excellent news Keeping - I'm keeping my fingers crossed for some peace for you until Friday x

Keeping Again, good luck and strength to you. I'll be looking for an update and hope he does get out by the end of the week.

I don't speak to my ex at all. We communicate by text as and when we need to as every single call ended in shouting. You have a long way to go but soldier on. It's worth it. Even though I still get the odd piece of crap to deal with 4 years later, it's still 1000% better than living my life how it was.

Well he didn't go at the weekend something about the room not being ready! He is going this weekend though.
On a good note though I have found the marriage certificate

I divorced mine on unreasonable behaviour.

I consulted a Resolution solicitor, and would have agreed reasons with ex if he had gone the collaborative law route. He didn't, and although pissed off with my true reasons, did not contest the divorce.

Tbh, it was much easier than I thought to collect reasons. I just noted his behaviour as it happened, eg refusal to acknowledge what I said to him, leaving the house cluttered with his collectables from his business. Sol wrote up about 5 of the reasons for submission on the petition.

The problem I have is that he will contest anything that says he is remotely to blame. I have just found out he has told all of his family he is leaving me because I have stolen thousands from him and our SN son. God I hate that man! He has also just landed on me that he intends to move out next friday while the kids are on half term! He is such a bastard. He tried to tell me that, me not being able to tell him when things have gone wrong or me being wary of speaking to him a bout things I know will set him off, make me a nutter and is ridiculous and that nobody else would ever do anything like that. Then started calling me stupid and an idiot for crying.
I really feel like packing all of his things and changing the locks while he is working away over the bank holidays

Failure to complete DIY projects...hmm may use this against hubby

op on a serious note, his behaviour is unacceptable and i wish you all the best...some fantastic advice on here....i used unreasonable behaviour on my exh many years ago...but that was mainly physical abuse towards me

Keeping Can't believe he's dragging it out again - fingers crossed he gets his arse out on Friday. Just freeze him out 'til then and don't worry about what he's saying to his family. They must know what a twonk he is - they're fooling themselves if they believe him. Don't let him see you cry - he's not worth it. Keep that thought of you and your boys getting on with your lives high up in your mind and it'll be your reality sooner than you know.

As for your unreasonable behaviour petition, if he's going to contest anything that says he's to blame then if you take him seriously, you can't petition at all. Just ignore him and draft it anyway - keep the allegations light but most definitely blameworthy and crack on with getting that petition into court. Once the divorce process is started, its very very unlikely that he'll cross petition (even if he's eligible for legal aid, you can't get it for cross-petitioning) and all you have to do is prove service to get it through. So just ignore him on that front too!

Changing the locks is not a good idea, but could you go away yourself overnight when he is due to move out? Perhaps get a friend or neighbour to give you the 'all clear'?

The day before I moved out, my exH worked from home and I was on tenterhooks all day, trying to pack and sort things out and feeling like I couldn't really do anything. I was dreading him standing on the drive the following day as we drove off behind the removal van. Fortunately, he went out about 4pm and didn't go back to the house until after we had moved out the next day. The most bizarre time was when the van was packed and we were waiting for the phone call to say the house purchase had completed...the kids and I sat at the table playing Cluedo like nothing out of the ordinary was happening!

Hope things go smoothly for you.

He is all about control. He has gone out to the pub every night at about 4pm and blocked my car in so even if I wanted to I couldn't go out. I don't think his family do think he is anything but a betrayed husband (I know how they treat and talk about his brothers XW). I intend on keeping every reason as vague as possible.
I have come up with 3 so far. 1, there is no affection in our relationship, we are not intimate any more, 2, I feel like I have to be careful when I talk to him and avoid telling him negative things and 3, we don't socialize together with him preferring to socialize alone. These are all variations of what I have read on here and what the solicitor said, and are true.
On the other hand he said if I can take over the mortgage and don't chase him for maintenance then I can keep 100% of the house. I am going to look into it as I know there will be no maintenance.
I know changing the locks is a bad idea, I just feel like doing it. I am holding it together, just!

Going away isn't an option, I did think about it, but firstly I can't afford it and secondly it is difficult to just go away for a few days with a disabled child