Partner staying over + children who still get into bed with you

[thebighouse]

How does that work then?!

I've got no idea where to start with all this stuff...

Ooo I shal watch this thread! I am living with my DP and his DD sometimes gets into bed if she has had a nightmare or something. I always go sleep on the sofa but he thinks I should stay in bed. No help obviously, very sorry!

DSS2 totally ignored me, went around the DHs side and just got in.

DH and I took things slowly but looking back I think it was for our benefit as the kids never found any of it strange.

In my experience, my friends who have carried on letting the children get into their bed, sometimes every night, are the ones who end up divorced. I'm not trying to sound dramatic but it's incredibly important that the children don't push one of the parents out. It's pretty obvious what this does to a marriage. It's hard enough with children to have some time when it's just you and being in bed a night is one of those time. I'm old fashioned and pretty strict by modern lefty standards but I feel children need to know that they are to stay in their own beds for sleeping and that is their domain and our bedroom is for us. Sometimes giving into children makes a rod for your own back. Obviously nightmares etc you are there for them but I have always been pretty reluctant to go down the route of everybody in one bed. Sorry if that isn't useful for your situation.

How is the relationship between DP & DC generally? If you've taken it slowly and he's a fairly permanent fixture for them day to day then agree they'll prob just hop in your side. May find DP gets hauled in on the chat if they are generally good friends.
Give a decent heads up to both parties. How does DP feel?