MIL Rant......long- sorry.

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XMIL Lives aboard has made 4 visits so far this year to England?..not once has she asked to see my DS.

8 Weeks ago she arranged to see him with XFIL at my house for 4 hours this Sat, I?m fine with that?.had notice so was ?happy? to re arrange one of his paid in advance for activities?.will lose the money but don?t want to rock the boat.

3 Weeks ago she rang to re arrange the time, as they were meeting friends and didn?t want to rush leaving them. Grit teeth and say fine.

2 Weeks ago she rang to say that the friends there?re meeting are taking them to lunch at a local pub and can I bring my son to the pub to see them so they can enjoy their meal without having to keep looking at the time!

I did explain that I?d already cancelled one club and we wouldn?t have a lot of time to get to pub and then on to the next club, plus I take another child which would mean double backing on myself to pick up. So it would only leave about 45 minutes? of visit time with my DC . Her answer bring the other boy as well, they wouldn?t want to put me out?..said in a very patronizing voice.

So??.I text my XP and told him to tell his parents we can?t make the meeting?explained why and shock, horror, he ARGREES with me. [BISCUIT] He told his parents and also added he didn?t want his son in a pub?He (XP) is a recovering alcoholic and his father his high functioning alcoholic.

Now however his mother is saying I am being awkward and keeping her DGS from her.[CONFUSED]

Sorry long rant?..have I done the right thing or am I just being "awkward"?

You've done the right thing!

You have done the right thing-she put her friends before seeing your ds so shes at fault not you

Why on earth should you scuttle about at her command?!
If she wants to see her dgc, then she knows where he lives. FFS, what a self important mare!

What else could you do! You couldn't keep pandering to her whims.

No of course you're not being awkward, they're prioritising lunch with friends over a few hours with your DC.

She sounds like a right pain. Well done to your ex for backing you up.

She's dropped your DS like a hot potato at the offer of a pub lunch with her mates. If she was that arsed about seeingher DGS she would have told her friends that she couldn't do the lunch as she was seeing DGS and I'm sure her friends would have understood. She can't possibly spend quality time with them whilst having her lunch in a pub with her mates. You have pandered to her enough already, good on your XDH for telling them too.

X post with Polly

Wow,, thanks for the very kind replies. I did sort of know I was not being awkward, How ever it's been a very hard and difficult 8 years of this toxic women making my life a misery. The mind gets confused. And yes I do think that now my XP can admit he is/was an alcoholic makes him see things as they are and not as his mother "paints" them. Therefore fighting my and my son's corner. Thanks again..feel so much better now, !!

Morning.....

My XP is recovering alcoholic and not had contact with my DS for the last 8 years. Contact now is on my son's terms. At present he does not want any more than a couple of hours on his own with his father. More to it than this..but it's a very long story and an other thread all together!

You have done the right thing. Her priority should be her grandson.

Seeing a grandchild trumps a pub lunch with friends. You aren't keeping your son away from xpils, they just have an odd set of priorities.