Is there anyone here happy with their lot?

[happygoluckyinOz]

Hi all fellow mumsnetters.

I?ve been a long time lurker on this site, picking up useful hints and tips over the months, but after spending some time on the relationships forum I can?t help but notice that most of the topics on here are from people who are sometimes in the most terrible of situations with their OH?s. I think mumsnet is a great place for people to come and get some sound advice in an anonymous way and hopefully either turn these situations around for the better or find the strength to leave and make a better life for themselves.

I wanted to start a more positive thread on here, hopefully to show that there are decent people in the world who will treat you as you are meant to be treated, and that you don?t have to put up with such awful relationships as they are not ?normal?.

With that ?caveat? out of the way, I just wanted those who are happy in their relationships to perhaps share a little story or tale about you and your happy relationship to give people some hope when they are feeling down.

I?m very happy with my lot at the moment. My DH and I met when we were both 19 and at University together, we?ve gone through moving to London, establishing our careers, two redundancies and a move to Australia together. We?ve been together 9 years next month and got married in the most beautiful ceremony surrounded by friends and family 18 months ago. He makes me smile and laugh at least 10 times a day, we love spending time just in each other?s company and sharing in each other?s hobbies (2 hours in the rain watching him play Sunday league football yesterday!)

Of course we have disagreements, but this is more along the lines of ?why can?t you stack the dishwasher properly?? or ?do you realise your socks have been in the middle of the living room floor for 2 days now?? rather than full scale screaming rows. My DH is not a romantic, the meaning behind flowers escapes him, at the end of his wedding speech he toasted ?to me!? and sat down, so he is not without his faults ? but he makes me insanely happy and I couldn?t imagine being without him. Next year we have plans to start a family and I just hope that we can stay as happy as we are now when the little bundle comes along.

Is there anyone else out there happy with their lot?
xx

When I look at my friends' and my own relationship, they don't fit the 'deliriously happy' or the 'abusive' threads, they are what I term 'normal', they love their partners, are mostly content and enjoy their company, but have periods of really disliking them or their behaviour; sometimes marriages seem on an up-swing in which everyone gets on well, equally they can be in a bit of a downward spiral especially if there are crises, money, health etc.

I read both sets of threads (the so happy I wake everyday as if in a dream and the abusive nightmares) and don't really relate to either; I certainly have happy times but it's not all happiness, not once you get into decades of living with its inevitable ups and downs.

Been with DH for 10 years, have 2 dc. I love him like people love each other in the movies. I just think he's absolutely great, and the nicest person I have ever met.
There are things about him that get on my nerves, of course, and I reckon I am pretty annoying too... But we just get on.
When we married, our circumstances were very different- He had a high-powered, well paid job, and I was having a career lull. He then lost his job, and I went after my career dream. Our income is nothing like it used to be, but we are happy.

I am happy and grateful with my DH.

Been together 7 years. I adore him.

Last couple of years have been tough, money and health problems.

But we are in it together. Thats what counts.

Just celebrated my 2nd anniversary with DH, and DS just turned 4 months. I've never been happier, and the only fights we have are usually caused by lack of sleep at the moment! :)

I´m very happy too.

We met 19yrs ago, been married nearly 17yrs & have 2 teenagers who really are pretty easy (touch wood!!)

Daughter quite a bit of a drama queen but starting to see the funny side of herself now.

I think that things have got better over the years.

We just seem to fit each other.

Agree with Mdm Bovary that "happiness writes white". People who are genuinely happy with life, their relationships, work etc don't have the need to be talking about it all the time. It just shows in their attitudes, behaviour, and the way they treat other people.

So I love these occasional threads, that restore some balance on this site, and show couples who really love and care for each other .

Happily loved up people don't post about problem relationships. So the proportion of unhappy posters here is always going to be high.

I'm a very lucky woman. Married to the man I still adore after 33 years together. Wonderful children and stepchildren. We all get on well and my dh is a wonderful father, husband and lover.
We've just returned from a few days away together, and were as loved up as we always were.

Yep, very happy. :) Been together 7 years and married for 3, we have a daughter together and things just keep getting better.

Yep, very happy and DH is too.
More time for the two of us at the moment which always helps us.

I'm happy

I went on a girls' night out recently where some of my friends were complaining about their DP/DHs, and I was struggling to think of things to say so I didn't feel left out. I think I managed a genuine complaint about him never doing the washing up.

I don't even want to tempt fate that my relationship is going fabulously as everytime one of my friends asks how it is going and I say " lovely" we have a very heated debate lol

I have been with my DH 7 years, first wedding anniversary at the end of the month.

I ADORE him. He's lovely, kind, funny, intelligent, hard working, consientious. He is committed to our relationship and likes to see me happy. He supports me in what I want to do, I feel loved. He outs up with my family and spends a lot of his free time with them. He is gorgeous

He says that we are lucky, that some people think love should be hard work, and that people can end up together and married etc and not be happy, not knowing that people can feel how we feel about each other.

We have normal problems like money (never enough, no savings, can't afford to move house) but have never come up against anything big so I worry/wonder how'd we'd cope, and rwading this board sometimes I worry he'll leave me/cheat on me/use prostitues not at the moment, he says I have him worn out! but I reason there's no need to worry unless aproblem presents itself.

Life is short, everyone deserves to be happy. I have been in a bad/abusive relationship previously and would like to say to all posters in crisis on here, you deserve happiness and it is out there.

Apologies for the typos, bloody ipad which I bought him because I am a good wife, but might explain why we have no savings

i am happy as a pig in shit really. was just thinking this morning that i have the best DH on the planet

the only thing i could use some more of is money but that's because i'm a greedy caaah not because we are especially hard up!

speaking of money i think an HUGE proportion of the peace in our rs has to do with us having exactly the same attitude towards money (i.e. we are tight about all the same things, and will spend lavishly on all the same things, we save at the same rate, we have the same risk profile).

we've never had a money argument. even a move overseas (complete with leaving job/business back home, with no new prospects lined up!) didn't have a single financial blip.

i feel v sad for people (of either sex) who are married/partnered to people who are spendthrifts. it must be the most horrifically stressful and conflict-laden thing. my DM and 'D'F were in such a marriage. actually come to think of it, my sister is too...

Really enjoyed reading these happy stories. My own happiness came recently when I had an Epiphany and realised that although happiness might be in large part because of a happy relationship but it is also possible to be happy and not in a relationship. Either way, keep an open mind and beware of knowing what you want...

I feel very lucky, as I met DH young, both in our mid teens, we were both in other 'relationships' and drifted and did our own things - university I moved away, he stayed at home, he then got a job in London and I moved back home - but our paths kept crossing and our interests and circles were so intertwined it was impossible to ignore.. We started meeting up and dating even though he was in London and I was at home, and looked forward to when he would be coming home to a new job, shortly before this I got a job in France and decided to go for it. We didn't set any rules, just said that we'd see each other when I got back, we both pined like crazy and the only 3 days I came home the entire time I was in France he was away on a lads holiday, we wrote postcards and spoke online almost every single day. The day I arrived back he took me out for dinner and we've been together every single day since.

We celebrated our first Anniversary at the end of April, and are expecting our first DD in 5 weeks time. We are both still young, in our early-mid twenties, but I have faith that it will last the test of time. Some things are just meant to be in life, and I feel honoured to be lucky enough to have everything I could have ever wished for :)

I always find MN a bit of an anomaly to my experiences in RL.

There's so many affairs, upset and divorces on here, but in RL practically all of my friends are mostly happily married. No one in my circle of friends are going through a divorce in RL, its just not something any of my friends have done yet. That said, I do know several couples where one of the partners are in their second marriages. Of course that doesn't mean their marriages are perfect - we all like to have our little bitches and moans when the DHs aren't there. But most in my circle are essentially happy.

I know I am... Yes, I do moan and bitch about my DH and his laziness, but essentially we're happy. We bicker, but at the end of the day I always know that he fights in my corner, as I do for him. He still makes me laugh and I still enjoy spending time with him. We've been together 15 years, married for 11 (almost).

Yes I am most certianly very happy with my lot. Not just happy, but content, secure and very much grateful for the life I have.

Me - I'm very happy with my DH. Definitely think I married the right man for me - and he's proved to be a great dad too.