what would you do ?

[sisterblister]

im a regular but have name changed

after a year of not having any contact i met with my first love who recently split with his wife we met on tuesday he came over and we spent a lovely few hours together before he went to work ,since then i have texted him once - no reply ,no email
im confused
its like it menat nothing i feel as cheap as a prositute ,he might aswell paid me for all it meant to him - would it kill him to text back
i feel so used
what should i do ?

He sounds horrible or he is embarrassed

I don't know what to say except it sounds damn rude to ignore you

thats what i though but i really care for him and he was so sweet to me - very attentive and then nothing ??
i dont want to be annoying and keep texting or emailing - should i just send one asking whats going on ?

Perhaps he views you as a friend with benefits - he's just split from his wife, he's not really in a good frame of mind to start a new relationship tbh.

i dont want anything from him relationship wise but to not say a word after the time we spent together is so harsh :(

I agree with Random ie he may have thought that he was ready to move on but I presume realised that wasn't.

Also, it wasn't just random sex with a stranger ie you both have history together. Maybe he thinks that you want more and he knows that he simply can't provide anything more at the moment. It is a bit rude though.

Presumaly you had reasons for splitting with your first love and whatever they were have been proved valid.

You don't need an ill-mannered guy in your life; chalk it up to experience and don't fall into bed with any more old flames until you can be assured that they are reformed characters.

What should you do? Leave him where he belongs - in the past! Forget him. Sounds like he just wanted an ego boost and a guaranteed shag. He sounds like a bad mannered knob.

you are probably going to have to chalk this one up to experience, don't beat yourself up about it. It was rubbish of him to do this to you, he has used you as emotional/sexual succour after the break down of his marriage. That was a shitty thing to do to someone you have a history with, but hes the fool, the friendship is buggered now and its his fault.

You did nothing wrong, you had a pleasant sexual experience, but you are going to have to treat it as a one nighter and move on im afraid.

Wonder if this is my ex? Sorry :-( in my younger days I would have chalked this up to a case of 'bored and horny' been flattered and got on with my life. How one man treats you is not a testament of your real value. Don't beat yourself up x

well all change he emailed and texted last night so im very happy - he has been very busy with work and college

Too busy to text back?

Although it depends on the text you sent.
Did it require a reply?

Sorry but i dont think its changed at all im afraid - im assuming he had a crap that day, he could have posted whilst on the toilet, could have posted just before he went to bed? posted whilst having breakfast? Don't let him use you

i agree boring

Sorry to echo what others are saying, but it's coming up to a week, so perhaps he's looking for a weekly sex.

If that's what he has in mind, he is viewing it as a recovery/stop gap sex.

It takes less than a minute to send a text... be very careful not to make a fool of yourself over him.

It sounds as though you're thinking 'potential relationship' and he's thinking 'casual sex'. It's difficult when it's with someone you have a past with, as those old feelings surface. If you were seeing things as they actually are, you might feel different. Like others have said, it takes a minute to text someone. If he was really keen then he would have been in touch much sooner. You'll meet up again, have sex, and then he'll be silent again, until he fancies sex. I think you might be setting yourself up for a fall

Do be very careful of this man, for all the reasons everyone has already said.

Be friends, but unless you are very clear that you don't want a relationship with him, don't be "friends with benefits".

im afraid to say you were all right stupidly i met with him this week too and it started well but in the end i couldnt wait for him to leave - he started wittering on about some other girls he had been ( one was a model dont cha know) with on smaller break ups with his wife ,that put me right off .
i feel so used and i know it was a mistake and now i just feel utterly worthless

Cliched but true, don't base your feelings of self worth on anyone else.

i really he thought he was different he was my first love ,he has changed as i have i was just a booty call until he moves on -stupid cow i am

You're not stupid, you just wanted more than he did.

Unless you want sex, don't have it, then if it develops into something else, it's a bonus. You haven't been 'used' you had an itch and you scratched it

we did have sex this time not last week but it felt awkward and cringy at times

"it felt awkward and cringy at times"

Go with what your body's telling you.

He isn't the person that you pictured him to be. He could have at least been honest with you. To ignore your text completely was terrible, especially given that you have history together and hadn't just met.

All you can do is be kind to yourself, whilst you move on.

Better move on hun and leave it , he will be back though i am sure he is just being a man and , thinking about His NEEDS, relax and get on with your life , if he really liked you he will be back not this week maybe in a couple of month s, Men are like a big bit of elastic they come bakc when you least expect it, but you need to decide whether you want to have him back and if he is worth all the angst. Good luck and take care, men really can put us girls through it , I know have so been there.

So he regularly splits up with his wife, shags other women and then gets back with her. Lovely. Does she know? As far a she knows they might just be having a bit of space whilst remaining faithful, making you the ow.