Today I Am a Hater

[ImAHater]

Today I'm a hater, really I am, people need to stay away from me...

1. I hate my husband He's a wolf in sheep's clothing so subtly controlling and manipulative
2. I hate 4pm - 6pm I pick the kids up from school and its moan, whinge, cry, tantrum, everyone's farking staaaaaarving but don't want their dinner
3. I hate my friends They're always too busy to do stuff, you look on FB and they've doing stuff with each other. I'm making an effort to make new ones
4. I hate my MIL, she was besotted with her grandchildren when they were babies but now they're grown has zero interest. She's in her mid 50s, drives and is in good health but has turned into the 'B'day/Xmas Only Granny'
5. I hate my mom (I don't but I need to continue the theme) I wish she was in her 60s and healthy not in her 80s and crippled with arthritis
6. I hate my brothers When thier kids were small I had them for sleepovers, weekends, day trips to the beach, amusement parks etc, between them they've managed a trip to the park or corner shop once or twice with mine
7. I hate not having babysitters I really fancy a nice out or weekend break, no farking chance
8. I hate my job but need it, I am applying for jobs though
9. I hate feeling jealous of those around me who have granny's, in-laws, aunts and uncles all at their disposal who help out with the childcare

10. I hate feeling jealous of friends with husbands who actively encourage their wives to go out and have some space 11. I long for adventure, I've made an effort joined a social site and have been out, loved it, planning another soon 12. I hate not having the flexibility to pursue my hobbies

Excuse me...

Not sure if you want advice, not that I have any anyway, but do you mind if I ask what the social site was that you joined? I'm desperate to start getting out and doing something new and different again.

I feel for you OP, I have days when I feel the same.

On a positive note, by getting it all listed down on paper you have recognised what's really getting to you and are starting to address some issues. Good luck with that, I'm sure you will work things out in the end.

TooEasilyTempted it's City Socialising, when you register choose the city that is closet to you.

Thanks.

Oh and I agree with CrispyCod - recognising what's bugging you and starting to address those things is a great start!

Hey, but on the plus side, IT'S FRIDAY! For me, that at the very least means two days of not having to make any packed lunches!

Not wanting to come across all hippy or anything, but how about making a little list of the stuff you don't hate? Start with anything that makes you smile - having a cup of coffee on your own before the 'farking' kids come home; putting your favourite song on; the hobbies you want to do when you get a chance. By the way, you'll have more time to do any of that stuff if you step away from the Facebook. Honestly, Facebook is the work of the devil! It won't make you any new friends, it will just make you feel envious of everyone who seems to be having a better time than you... when in reality, they're probably not. They're just better at making it look like they are.

As for the kids and the teatime whining ... as I said, it's Friday. Open a bottle of Coke, stick some chips in the oven, put a rug on the carpet and have an indoor picnic in front of the telly. Zero nutrition, but no whining!

Also, get bossy with your brothers. Don't take it personally that they haven't helped out much with your kids, in the way you did when their kids were younger. I expect that was when you didn't have kids, when you had the time and inclination to help. I used to be a great auntie before I had my own children, now I'm rubbish! So, don't be pissed off, just be a bit pro-active. They're not going to come begging to look after your children, so ask them outright for something specific. Say, I'm hoping to do x, so would you be able to have them for the day/evening/night on either this date or that date? Give them a choice of actual days, but don't be vague.

I have no idea what to do about your husband, though!

Leave the bastard?

Well, of course.

But line the MIL up to do a bit of babysitting first, may as well get your money's worth.

Can you explain to your MIL how you're feeling and get her to have the DC for an evening/day?

OP, I also feel jealous sometimes of people who have "support" from relatives etc.

Its not easy (job, kids ) but I really believe in time for yourself, self-indulgence, whatever, and hope you find a way.

Good luck