Need to discuss something

[MinkHollow]

Could someone with g/l experience or trust issues pm me please.

Thanks

Hello there

You might want to clarify a bit more what you mean

I don't understand what g/l means

and FWIW, I think most people wiould be more comfortable discussing onthread, at least initially

HTH

Hi AF. I was hoping you would see this! Basically it's about gaslighting and how to believe someone even though you still think they are lying to you about things.

If your gut instinct is telling you that they're lying, you're not going to be able to believe them.

However, it's not possible to give an opinion as to whether your instinct is sound unless you give an example.

How can you be made to believe someone whom you believe to be lying?

You can't. Well, perhaps a very skilled hypnotist. No actually, not even the most skilled hypnotist in the world could make you actually believe something you really don't believe.

Magic, then.

In other words, it's not possible.

Is it you being gaslit, or are you the gaslighter?

Don't try to force yourself to believe something you don't. You need rl help to come to terms with yourself and to gain faith in yourself.

Please tell us some more, that way people can talk to you and help you better.

you mean you want to try and add to the headfuck by forcing yourself to believe someone you know is lying to you ?

why would you do that ?

Please don't try to play that game. You're being, as AF said, headfucked enough.

Is it that you do, intellectually, believe that they are telling you the truth but your insides just won't let you believe it? Are you sure the problem is with you rather than them? (eg totally innocent spouse, you can't help accusing them of wanting to sleep with other people even though you don't really think they do? I've been on the receiving end of that one!)

Too many "believes" there, second one would read better as "accept".

Sadly once someone starts lying, and is found out and then attempts gasslighting, it is only a matter of time before things unravel.

It is much easier these days to delve, what with mobile phone history, text history, pc history and even 'trackers'.

What you need to start thinking of, is once you have proved that you are being lied to, what are you going to do with that information. Is it a deal breaker, and what are your options. Don't wait until the discovery is unraveled which could take weeks or months, and then think about what to do, you need to have a plan B if it is all proved to be true. Lies are distructive and repeated lies are disasterous to any relationship, they always leave scars which never disappear. You just have to decide NOW how often you are prepared to be lied to. Don't try to make a liars words fit, because it equates to gasslighting yourself! If it doesn't make sense then it is probably not true.