soo I am going to leave my shitty partner. I can't do it today because of various difficulties but I will be gone by the summer. The thing is, for no rational reason I keep getting sucked back in to giving things one last shot. Ultimately I feel like I can't get rid of the 'fantasy' of what Ithought my life would be.
Today I returned from work to be met with the news that he owed money to one of his 'mates' for cannabis which he has a long standing addiction to. When we were first together I stood by him through a serious addiction to cocaine. The odd spliff I tolerated now and again because tbh although it is not for me; I don't consider hash any worse than the odd glass of wine. He has also a history of problem binge drinking so has been teetotal for nearly 6 months. Anyway I digress, he was desperate for this money , fifty quid,which I did'nt have. He doesnt work due to a medium term disability and I had given him his weekly personal money of £100 only yesterday # I work , he brings and picks up kids from school# He was hassling me to ask SIL for money but his brother is already not talking to him because of money.
So then he starts on about how he is going to ask our lovely but equally cash strapped neighbour for a loan. I caved at this point and gave himthe money so I am broke now til Friday, when I get paid.
Just to add that I manage all money because he is a gambler also. He makes me sick.
My job is actually a traineeship, involving college and work placements, the money is crap and we can't afford it. Two weeks ago he left me in the lurch because I wouldnt give him money, stormed out and I didnt see him for 4 days, missed work and now have to make up hours.