recently left a controlling/EA man. I didn't realise how bad it was until I left and am remembering more and more as I reflect. He quite often used to block my way out of rooms I was trying to get out of and jokingly push me over (usually onto the bed or sofa, rarely onto anywhere that had the potential to really hurt me...though he did accidently sometimes). He also sometimes asked me to put my hand up so he could punch...again in a 'jokey' way, but it sometimes hurt. He did stop that after I refused to let him do it again.
I never thought there was anything wrong with that behaviour, but clearly there is.
He never did it in an argument and he also never lashed out. It's like he did it when I was doing something else (i.e. not giving him attention).
Is there any way that that behaviour is not very wrong? What if he had never been verbally abusive and was the perfect DP in every other way? He wasn't, but just say he was for the sake of argument..