One minor indesgression

[HowamIgoingtocope]

Okay not sure where to start but last year DH had a minor indescresion with a "girl" at work , basically she pounced on him and he recipricated the kiss.

Our relationship had been breaking down according to him , I just thought he was working alot , he works from home as well as a full time job.

Anyway , after this his anger became worse much to a point where he moved out of the family home to a small town 40 miles away from us. He has no landline and is hard to get hold off.

Anyway we started talking and agreed there were things that had to change if we were to make things work.

One thing he wouldnt change was to stop his freindship with this girl.

I have 2 young children who are suffering with this as my PND is creaping back in and Im finding it hard to cope.

He is confusing me with his actions and at the moment I feel he is having an affair emotionally or otherwise with this girl. he has done more for her in the past month than he has for me in the past year.

I am destraught and now need to think about the kids and my wellbeing, but have no idea what to do.

I also think he is storing a vehicle for this girl in a parking spot we have paid for.

He tells me what I want to hear. I have not been able to get in contact with him over the past few days so am seriously thinking of dumoing his stuff in the street.

This post is really bitty , i will have to find a better explanation of it all.

My husband suffers from major depression and his actions are not like him, no excuse I know, he is currently waiting for treatment which doesnt seem to be coming.

Any advise would be helpful. Ill post back soon whenI have got my head to gether a little bit.

Why does he need a few days? And if he messes you around why will you become 'the loopy wife' rather than just leaving telling him to get lost and moving on with your life?

Your talk doesn't sound at all positive the way you've described it, but wish you luck and hope it works out.

It does sound like he is still messing you around.
Good luck.

The only reason anyone in this position needs a few days to be 100% sure is because they want a few days to consider what their other options are. And the whole "worried I have done too much damage for us to recover from" thing is such a cliche too I'm afraid. I hope it works out but he does not seem the type (from what you have posted here) to take any responsibility or put any effort in himself.

He has left you for another woman.

They are living together, or she is staying there with him most of the time.

He is stringing you along. He has been having sex with her, no questions.

Stop taking responsibility for your husband acting like an utter cock to you and his children. Stop taking him presents. Stop making contact with him. If you want to make it work, it all has to come from him. He has to be sorry, he has to tell you the truth, and he has to move his entire life around to try and get you back. You should not be fighting for him.

At the moment, he has two women running around after him. He must feel like the most important man in the world! And he gets it all like acting like a muppet!

oh dear

i think you are making a very big mistake to take this man back

you deserve better than this feckless loser

So you want him back on any terms, regardless of what he's done? Because, make no mistake about this, he IS having an affair with this woman, and is considering coming back to you only as long as he can continue to have sex with her and that you stop nagging him about it.
If you still want him back on those terms, then I guess that's up to you, but just be very clear that that's what's happening.
So sorry, though.

Sorry. You are not fighting for your marriage. That has been destroyed. You can never get back what you had.

You are fighting for the prize of a man who put another woman before your marriage, before you and before your children.

Him giving you another chance although he thinks it is too broken (good excuse for a few weeks/months down the line). What is that about? He lost the choice to give you another chance.

In your OP you needed to think about the kids and your well being especially your mental health. Do you honestly think him being in contact with her and seeing her because you are not worth him giving her up is going to be good for that?

Good luck.