Lostboys, I do think there is something you can get out of joint counselling, as a couple of others have said.
The thing is, he can only get away with talking about his work all the time, and also taking his stress out on you, because you let him. This is an issue with you- not him, IFSWIM.
There needs to be a changed dynamic in the relationship where you are not the conductor for his stress, and where both of you see that continuing to talk about things which he tells himself he cannot change, stops.
Another thing- if you change, he will. These phrases are helpful-
"We cant change others, we can only change ourselves", and
"Only he is responsible for his life and attitudes, and you for yours".
"If one person changes in a relationship, the other must too".
Actually my own h and I, up to the end of 2005, talked endlessly about his work. (Also because I do some workplace mentoring on occasion as work). This had gone on for some years. Now, in the end we fell out about it, because I got to the point of saying that I didnt want to talk about it so much any more, and I meant it. And certainly not three hours a night.
My reasons were that:
a) it made no difference to his actions there, and in fact because I disagreed with some of his strategies, it also annoyed him
b) I am not his mum or mentor, I am his wife and
c) I was fucked off with talking about him all the time- he certainly hardly ever returned the favour.
But at the same time, he didnt deal with his issues. In fact, a few months later, he started to sex chat lots of OW on the net, which took years for me to get to the bottom of/find out about, and ended up with us at Relate, as mentioned above. Personally, that is where I think he took his stress instead, in part, because he would not face the underlying issues in him.
The issues were a dysfunctional childhood he had not processed in his head, and a need to control others and situations (at home and at work), amongst others. These manifested themselves in workaholism, effectively, with consequential stress, marriage issues etc, and latterly infidelity.
Interestingly, he now says he didnt get much out of all those work conversations anyway- a wife who said 'there there, never mind', or words to that effect, were what he was really after, and I can see why, now.
It is quite possible for you to set a time or life space issue on his work related stress and discussion. Offer sympathy, no other comments, and leave him to sort. eg 'Im sure you'll think of something, you are really resourceful as a rule', type of thing.
If he is angry, walk out of the room, and refuse to hear it. You can find a form of words about this, Im sure.
Then at the counselling sessions you can work at the relationship issues and have a chance to air the things which come up. He can start to focus on how he is going to address his own issues and make a start. You can look at your need to allow his unreasonable behaviour, and other stuff, no doubt.
There are always, always solutions if he looks for them, or partial ones, etc.