DH has again initiated THE Talk. (child related)

[QuintessentialShadows]

We have two lovely boys. 9 and 6.

Life has had its ups and downs (more downs) over the last few years, it has been really shit for so many reasons. Not our relationship, it is good. But he wants a third child, and bring this up gently ever so often.

I give my reasons why not. And he listens.
Like:
The age gaps will be big.
Not fair on our boys that I will be pregnant and out of action for some time, considering we like to go mountain hiking, cycling, camping.
Travel abroad will be more expensive with a third child.
Need bigger car
Secondary school fees for one extra child.
Expensive

etc.

All very shallow reasons, I must admit.

The biggest fear is SPD again.
I feel "too old " for sleepless nights, breastfeeding, etc again.
Worried PND will rear its ugly head.

Non of these reasons are good enough for somebody who wants another child, though.

I am torn. I am also 40.

I only have the one and at 43 and on my own I don't think I will get the chance for another. I ask my friends when they are considering another what do they think they will look back on when they are old and what might they have wished they had done. I know the answer for me even tho it would be very hard now would be that I would have wished for a bigger family.

Your husband sounds so lovely, you lucky thing.

I understand the SPD. I hear it is absolute agony.

All the best you two.

Thanks, lots of food for thought here. Such a touching post lemonylemon, thanks for sharing.

Some days I am really broody, and would love nothing but having number 3. But, then I start thinking about the reality of it, and I feel scared it may not be the right choice.