anyone here "voluntarily" celibate?

[KarmaK]

I've made the choice not to have sex again until I'm in love, in a stable relationship and feel 150% comfortable with having sex.

This may not happen in my lifetime and that is OK :)

Me too!

I don't ever want to feel like this:
Finally slept with love of my life and think my heart is going to be broken Message poster ButWhyIsTheGinGone Sat 24-Mar-12 09:16:46

My life just plods on, without highs or lows.

I know it's not for everyone, but can't be doing with being an emotional mess.

I've been celibate for 10 years.
Can't be doing with internet dating.
Sex was hopeless with my XH so not bothered really.

I would like Mr Nearly Perfect, no compromises. Maybe he'll turn up, maybe not.

@FarBetterNow - have you decided not to date due to the celibacy?

I do still date. I just don't f*ck. I guess it's kind of like in the olden days when women didn't get horizontal at the drop of a hat :-)

KarmaK - I suppose I can't be bothered dating.
When reps or clients come into work, which is a mainly male environment, I usually think 'imagine getting stuck with him all evening on a date'.

I enjoy my time on my own at weekends. I like going home to an empty house.
Maybe I feel lonely once a year.
If I didn't work so much and had more time I would think about dating.

I need to change my mindset and think of it as a (hopefully) fun evening out.

Do you do Internet Dating?

I was single from 23 to 28 (with the odd no-strings one night stand ) which put me in a fantastically strong mental place when I met dp two years ago.

Serial monogamy only wears you down, because you don't properly recover from the relationship - it was during my single years that I finally recovered from the rollercoaster that was my first adult relationship (age 16-19)

Mind you, I'd also convinced myself that I didn't want kids so now that I have dp and we want a family together I've got five years of being broody to catch up on!

I was voluntarily celibate from 2007 to 2011, did me the world of good. I'm now in a very loving relationship and enjoy sex and feel comfortable and respected. Prior to the birth of my daughter, I was a bit of a 'sort' as it were and had very loose views on sex, which, at the time, I thoroughly enjoyed, but something changed when DD was born and I decided to have a good few years to myself and so glad I did!!

It's rather liberating, and if this relationship were to fail (hope it doesn't, touch wood) then I'd be celibate again :)

I'm with you Karmak

The thought of dating or having sex with anyone makes me feel sick to the stomach just now.

Definitely enjoying being on my own the nights I don't have DD - going to the gym and out with friends ... not interestested in meeting anyone just now

I am hoping when(/if) I am ready though that I can manage to take it slowly and not rush into anything .. which has always been my problem before

Do you do Internet Dating?

No, it doesn't appeal to me

I've been celibate since leaving my ex in 2009. I needed a lot of recovery time after ex - not a nice man. I agree with FarBetter that a lot of the men I meet inspire me with boredom at the idea of being stuck with for hours on end.

There are things I miss - sex, a hug, some help with practical things. Mostly, though, I feel grateful to be free.