Am I just a horrible wife?

[MerlotSchmerlot]

Before I start, I do know this is a minor problem in the grand scheme of things, I'm just looking for some sound advice, mumsnet-stylee...

My husband runs his own business and cannot stop talking about it - EVER. It's completely doing my head in.

In the past (years ago, pre-children) I worked in the business too but being with DH 24-7 was no good for me (and we didn't work well together) so now I just help out with the occasional thing.

DH would love me to be more involved but we've discussed it and I just don't want to.

The business is based around his talent, his passion. I have my own career which I'm looking forward to getting back to properly when DS1 starts school.

DH wants to talk about his work ALL THE TIME. (OK, it's probably not all the time but it feels like it.)

I just can't maintain enthusiasm for it. After a long day with our two DSs and one minded child I just want to sit and drink a cup of tea without having to fake enthusiasm for him telling me all about a potential client or some great article he's read about how to improve the business.

It feels like the more I resist hearing about things the more he talks about it, often repeating himself and rarely pausing to take a breath (or let me get a word in).

Some days I feel like I'm a horrible negative person who needs to snap out of it. Other days I think why should I have to listen to this?

I long for a DH with a normal job who gets home, tells me about his day and then SHUTS UP about it.

Am I just a horrible person?

No, it's like hearing about someones dream they had or what they did last night-no one cares!!! Aaaagh!
Although you do kinda have to listen to done work talk, especially as it's his passion too, you shouldn't have to listen to loads of it. My DH hates talking about his work as he's been doing it for hours in the day the last thing he wants to do is talk about it when he gets to his home!
Before he gets a chance to start up again blurt out non work related questions or memories, or have a date night even just in the house where no work or children talk is allowed! Drag him out for a walk in the evening to 'clear his head' after work and spend some time with you-he should get that this implies no work talk!
It's impossible to listen to someones stories about their passion, if you don't know/care about it, like if a colleague of mine kept blathering on about like, their love of rugby, or surfing I would happily tell them 'Oh really, do tell me more about this subject I have zero interest in, please! Haha!' but it's more difficult with a husband because yous are meant to support each other & be interested etc.
I dunno what to suggest really...humans are good at picking up subtle body language clues and know when someone isn't interested in what they're talking about.. Try some humour too, or just say 'I massively appreciate your hard work and effort to bring money in and fully support your passion about it, but I would like to talk with you about other things in the evenings, and for you to relax and enjoy time with me and the kiddies? :) '

you've tried being polite and you've tried swithcing off.
neither seems to help.
may i suggest earplugs?

He sounds like my FMIL. She talks even though people were having other conversations.

Ex would at time also go on and on and on about issues that bothered him.

It is exhausting and you have my sympathy.

humans are good at picking up subtle body language clues and know when someone isn't interested in what they're talking about
Some are not. I've met some.

What to men do in those situations? Just say the appropriate word in the right places.

Or... start talking about your day and don't let him have a word in?

Does he have friends? Are you the only person he talks to?

Suggest a date night with no work talk, as a Big Romantic Thing. Then afterwards say how lovely it was to forget about work for a bit and point out how good it would be to do this more often, hopefully he will agree to this. Then next time he starts up, listen for a bit (I should think a little bit of work talk acceptable) then say that you think "we've" talked about work long enough now, kiss/cuddle, then change the subject to something like family or your relationship or sex. It sounds like he doesn't pick up on the fact you're bored of it so you may need to be more obvious/direct about it if this doesn't work, but there should be a bit of genuine listening first, it's only fair.