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Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

advice please ladies!!

12 replies

jco · 01/02/2006 23:14

Just wondered what you think about this...

I'm a single mum, two kids. 3 months ago met a guy who i really liked and things have been great, he's told me many times that he loved me. then a few weeks ago he started to become a bit distant. he lives about an hour away from me and he's got a lot on at work and isn't getting in till about 10 at night. Not spoke to him properly since i last saw him on friday, when we do speak he seems distracted. We have sent the odd text and he says he's missed me but only after i said it first. I know he's telling the truth about having a really mad time at work and about being under a lot of pressure but don't know why he should be so distant. i've got to the point where i'm wondering if he's losing interest. He was surpose to be coming up this weekend but has emailed me to say he's got a lot of work to prepare for a court case he has to attend next week (he's not the defendant, its about an employee he sacked)What do I do, is he messing me around or should i just give him a bit of space, don't understand men!! thats probabley why i'm divorced!!

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Aloha · 01/02/2006 23:16

I think he's messing you about, sorry
If he's not getting keener three months in, I'm not very optimistic. I may be wrong, but you clearly don't think so. What a bummer.

mummytosteven · 01/02/2006 23:21

ditto Aloha. If you give him benefit of doubt, maybe he is a bit stressed about the court case, see if he seems keen to meet up next weekend/suggests it himself.

VeniVidiVickiQV · 01/02/2006 23:22

Agree with Aloha.

See how it is after this weekend. Doesnt look good though. Sorry

jco · 01/02/2006 23:24

think you're all right, am going to just leave it now and see what he does, see if he gets in touch. think i know in my heart its over though. How can somebody be telling you they love you one minute and then be all cold the next, don't understand it

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VeniVidiVickiQV · 01/02/2006 23:28

Some people are just like that. Really full on at first, and get bored quick. My DB was always a bit like that. Its no reflection on you.

jco · 01/02/2006 23:41

vvv what happened with your db? feel really let down, he was so full on he had me totally head over heels, very upset

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VeniVidiVickiQV · 02/02/2006 00:14

He, unfortunately would be full on full on full on for a couple of months and then get bored, not take calls, get the rest of the family to lie that he was out etc etc. Bit of a sod really. Sometimes wouldnt bother finishing with one before starting with another (no good at the confrontation aspect of "dumping" i think). Not suggesting that this is the case with your man.

Anyway, for the past 18 months he has been with the same girl and they are living together. Its a bit of a revelation really (although i understand that he has cheated on her, but i dont know how true that is). The odd thing is that this girl he is with is the one girl that our family has never really taken too - we all really liked the others he messed about.

Better you find out now though jco than a year down the line if this guy is a b*stard.

jco · 03/02/2006 19:30

well you were all right ladies!

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Dior · 03/02/2006 19:35

Message withdrawn

jco · 03/02/2006 19:53

just the usual crap, he's got a lot on and his head's all over the place!!!!

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Dior · 03/02/2006 20:18

Message withdrawn

jco · 03/02/2006 20:20

yep the very one!! I felt like saying 'yeah your right it is you....your a w..ker!!!!!!

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