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Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Pre-Natal Coitus

45 replies

DaniCF · 08/03/2012 15:46

Regardless of it seemingly being somewhat of a taboo subject amongst pregnant women (oh, the irony), I have been determined for some time to share with you all some of my personal musings and experiences relating to the dreaded ?s word? that is of course ?prenatal coitus?.

All of the literature I have browsed thus far, reconciles with the fact that it is perfectly safe to continue having sex throughout your pregnancy. That is unless your expansion is so vast it becomes physically impossible for your partner to even shuffle into your general vicinity, let alone evoke any kind of arousal in either of you. Let us hope not for now. What I have found though, is that there is never any further detail on the subject apart from the customary ?as long as it is comfortable? routine. What about the information people actually need? For example, should you perhaps curtail any apparent sexual depravities just in case the unborn foetus assimilates your debauched and licentious behaviours, leading to incurable psychological trauma later in life? Should the bungee rope and hungry hippos be placed safely in the wardrobe until after the birth and inevitable post-natal drought, is what we all really want to know, surely?

Of course nobody thinks having sex will actually harm the baby, in the sense that somebody might have an eye out, but should HOW we have sex be altered in both the physical and psychological sense of the word? Should everything now be in soft focus with Boys II Men playing in the background while you all bond together as a family? That in itself is a strange and slightly incestuous concept. Also, how rough is rough? There should be some kind of chart, what is hardcore pornographic sex to one couple, is an afternoon biscuit with a cup of tea to another. I guess in essence it just seems that little bit perverse to be acting out fetishist fantasies when there is another human observing from within, a human that is a product of your total inability to control these desires in the first place.

It is a subject I have been mulling over basically since I started looking and feeling pregnant and on a more personal level I have found myself slightly less inclined towards certain more adventurous activities, though not to any great extent. I certainly have not yet felt an inclination towards Boys II Men, though it may yet happen. I?d be greatly interested in hearing about other people?s experiences and their own particular views on the matter. Until then, maybe put the gas mask and candle wax away?

OP posts:
Nagoo · 08/03/2012 20:13
Hmm

What? So long as you don't have anyone riding your bump like a seaside donkey I'm guessing you'll be reet.

scarletforya · 08/03/2012 20:31
Hmm

Are you a frustrated would-be writer OP ?

ObsidianBlackbirdMcNight · 08/03/2012 20:54

Bad prose 3/10

LentillyFart · 08/03/2012 20:57

9/10 for weird

1/10 for whatever else you hoped to achieve

Sparklingbrook · 08/03/2012 21:00

Do what you like. Confused

Starwisher · 08/03/2012 21:30

Erm, bungee jump rope?

Why...

Abitwobblynow · 09/03/2012 06:20

What information do you need, though? What are you looking for?

The baby is completely protected by a cervical 'plug' (which will be the 'show' when your cervix starts opening), and to be honest it is a fantastic time sex wise because of all the, er, engorgement.

So are you being asked to do stuff you feel uncomfortable about? That is what I am picking up. And if so, isn't that about selfishness and disrespect, not sex?

tulippa · 09/03/2012 06:48

Hungry hippos?

crestico · 09/03/2012 08:18

if it's not hurting you, it's probably not hurting the baby. doggy is the easiest if you're genuinely worried the bump may get in the way.

...rest of the post is failing at 'being funny' and essentially attention seeking bull.

EvenBetter · 09/03/2012 08:45

Are you a journalist for the Daily Star?
I assume if you got pregnant you know your muff well enough to know how to have sex.

QueenOfFlippingEverything · 09/03/2012 08:55

'another human watching from within'

Glad to know all that time I spent shoving postcards of Old Masters up my fanjo wasn't wasted. DS does indeed seem to have had a natural and precocious interest in art from a very young age and in playing with his willy but thats obviously down to all the kinky sex

LeBOF · 09/03/2012 08:56

Queen Grin

QueenOfFlippingEverything · 09/03/2012 08:57

He is very advanced, my DS.

He can say 'FART' as well now [proud]

Waspie · 09/03/2012 09:13

I had coitus pre-Natal. We were in the Kruger before we went to Durban. I can't say one was particularly better than the other, although the lodge in the Kruger park was the poshest hotel I've ever stayed in, so perhaps pre Natal is better...

nenevomito · 09/03/2012 09:21

Well that's just lovely and I look forward to hearing some of your copulation couplets in the near future.

joblot · 09/03/2012 09:22

queen you made my day

OracleInaCoracle · 09/03/2012 09:25

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by Mumsnet.

QueenOfFlippingEverything · 09/03/2012 10:22

lissie Shock

You are norty

ArtexMonkey · 09/03/2012 10:45

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Starwisher · 09/03/2012 11:07

Since when was it taboo too?

ArtexMonkey · 09/03/2012 11:20

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Starwisher · 09/03/2012 11:27

Why would it even enter your head op that sex was in anyway "bonding with the family"?

Shudder. Sorry op, I'm sure you just meant this as some humorous ramblings but it actually is.... Creepy

Quite right too artex.

OracleInaCoracle · 09/03/2012 14:40

Why was I deleted? Shock I was trying to share with the op! Mumsnet is all about parents coming together!

catieanna · 09/03/2012 14:45

I'm sure the op was just trying to make a joke, well i hope the op was! But its just plain creepy, but bonding as a family through sex! EWW no thank you. Thats just plain wrong!

What was the gist of what you were saying lissielou?

OracleInaCoracle · 09/03/2012 14:55

I merely offered to tell the op about my experience of pregnant sex and gave him the chance to get lotion to ease the chicken tickling