Regular, but NC-ed for this.
I left an abusive relationship nearly three years ago. It was the second time I'd left him, but the final time.
When I left him the first time, he had headbutted me, whilst I held our son in my arms. It wasn't the first time he'd assaulted me, by a long shot. The day after I left him, I phoned my parents to explain what had happened, and three weeks later, they came to visit, and took me to see some relatives nearby. On the drive home, my mother decided to tell me that I was over-reacting by pressing charges, and I hadn't made things easy on him by breastfeeding and co-sleeping. During an argument during the visit, my younger brother took to telling me that he wasn't surprised my ex had hit me, as I could be "fucking annoying at times" 
Whilst I was with my parents, the ex was sentenced. His stepmother, it seems, was more sensitive to what had happened to me, and scorned his sentence; 150 hours community service and a six month suspended sentence. The ex's step-mother told my own mother over the phone that she thought the sentence was too lenient. On the way back, my mother took the opportunity to tell me that she thought this proved the ex's remorse, seeing as he'd pleaded guilty. Between her and my father, they proceeded to tell me that my ex and I should try and work things out for my DS's sake. My father proceeded to tell me that he'd spoken to the ex on the phone, and that I had some changing to do as well, starting with weaning DS onto bottles and stopping the co-sleeping arrangement. I went back to the ex, feeling convinced I was as in the wrong as he was.
I stayed with the ex a further six months after going back to him, but towards the end of the relationship, it became clear he was going back to his old ways. The turning point came when he made an effort to hide my keys in the house, decided that feeding himself whilst he was at community service, and getting his tobacco fix was more important than allowing me to go and get food for DS that day. The following week, as I made plans to leave him, he began tracing my tracks online. Logging into my facebook if I left the house. Pretending to be me, in order to work out if I was cheating on him. He returned home one evening, stoned, and in the midst of an argument, began stabbing at his head with a fork, in front of a terrified DS. The next day, he grabbed DS, 16 months, by the arm in order to tell him off. Following that, I left him and went into refuge for the second time. My mother reacted badly to me leaving so suddenly, even though it was for DS's protection, telling me I was too hasty, and I should have got DS's highchair and cot out as well. The next two weeks, the ex took to phoning my sister in law, and telling her I was abusing DS, and phoning my father, alleging I had been having an affair with another ex. He also took to informing my mother that he'd make sure he got custody of my son. Despite this, my mother kept telling me that I should at least offer the ex access to DS, albeit supervised, but going through a contact centre was a bit of a "hysterical" reaction. Three months later, I went to visit my parents for the first time since the split. Nothing was raised about the reason of the split until I visited them a year later. That time, my mother decided to raise the issue in a busy, but quiet restaurant, in front of my DS, asking what had happened. At the time, I wasn't ready to talk about it, so declined to comment.
My younger brother and older sister are both aware of the nature of the relationship. However, over the past ten years, my relationship with my older brother has been almost non-existent. I've recently begun socialising with him again, but on my most recent visit, he asked what happened with the ex (he's isolated from my sister and younger brother for various reasons) as he felt Mum's story was inconsistent. My brother proceeded to tell me that over the past three years, Mum had begun to minimise the little she knew. She'd gone from telling my brother the ex had been violent, to telling him there'd been threats of violence, to then just saying "oh, we don't know what happened". I put my brother straight, but I can't shake this feeling like my mother's trying to minimise what happened to me, like she's ashamed of it. I'm wondering whether I should challenge her and my father over all of this? It's three years of resentment that feels like it's building and building, and at the moment, I'm not sure I want to see them when they visit in April, because I feel hurt that they're minimising what I went through to the people who, in my eyes, she should have been telling the truth to. :( AIBU?