Anybody else never orgasm with others?

[Melee]

I love my husband, I think he's a great lover, and I do really enjoy sex! I notice in another thread people saying they need foreplay to be 'ready'...well, I don't, I can go from 0 to 60 with a moment's notice! But I never come with him. I've never come for any man, no matter how much effort they put in. I can get NEARLY there, but then it just evaporates? I can do it myself, but it does take rather a long time mostly.

I don't fake, and like I say I enjoy myself a lot, but I just wonder at the back of my mind how weird I am to NEVER once in my life have come with a man, no matter how much I love him? :S

Is an orgasm a direct product of how much you love someone ?

Not IMO. I think it is a direct response to physical stimulation of the relevant areas of the body...(uless there are a lot of women out there "in love" with their vibrator, for example )

I also don't think you have to have an orgasm to enjoy sex, by which I am assuming you mean penetrative sex. Relatively few women have an orgasm with this alone. You say you don't need foreplay...do you not bother with it then ?

unless

I've had a fair few partners but have only ever orgasmed with four of them and never with penetrative sex. The thing is takes a while to get me there and I don't tend to feel comfortable enough to let them go on for as long as I need them to. Every now and then though someone comes along who I just feel "right" with and then it works. I don't think it's odd at all.

No by sex I mean allsorts, I'm fairly adventurous, not into S&M or owt but neither is he! Sometimes we do foreplay, sometimes not when the mood takes...but I still never come. He is very cuddly and caring and likes to be told what I like etc. a dream really...but I still never come?

Agree with AF.

I am a bit suspicious about the 10 orgasm a night ladies, but if its true, lucky them.

I do think there are a few positions which help- eg any position which ebales direct contact with clitoris. eg you on top and leaning forward a bit.

I cannot come by penetratin alone, and basically have to make myself come, which is just part of sex for DP and I. He can make me come too, but it does take rather a long time so most of the time I get on with doing it while we do other stuff, sometimes we both have a go and sometimes he just wants to put the effort in and he knows how long it takes so I don't worry.

Do you mean that you don't have an orgasm even if you are strumming the banjo yourself with a man there too? Or do you just mean it doesn't happen by man alone?

I enjoy sex too without an orgasm occasionally, I don't think there is anything wrong with that.

Melee, I don't think you are that unusual

If it bothers you, then fair enough, but you seem like you have a great sex life. I am sure lots of other women will come along and give you some erm, detailed tips, but that's not my style

I just wanted to make sure that you weren't labouring under any of those strange illusions that sex was all about PIV and the only end "result" being worthwhile was the man's ejaculation. I see you are not, so I shall bid you adios (and happy sexing)

If you're weird then so am I because no one but myself can make me have one! (and I can do it myself in about 2 seconds, but would find it dead embarrassing to 'show' DH what I do...damn catholic childhood!!!)

People have different thresholds and reactions.

I haven't with vaginal sex, definitely need appropriate clitoris stimulation. I usually use my imagination as well, which can speed it up considerably.

But orgasms can be different too.

I pretty much always do but that's because one or other of us is making it happen! DH is brilliant at waiting till I'm there so it happens at the same time. Makes it feel spontaneous even though it's usually not and the poor chap's been ready for ten minutes