Sorry in advance for the epic post, there is a lot to it.
Married Dh 5 years ago. Dh has always had impotence, no reason found, just one of those things. I loved him so accepted it. I know it affects him deeply but I thought we were so close I could help him through anything.
Our first and second child were born quickly and the marriage was ok, but not great. He never seemed to have any money, he was emotionally and sexually distant. I tried and tried whilst having 2 small children to keep him happy but couldn?t seem to reach him.
In feb 2010 I checked his phone and found a number. I asked him about it, it turned out it was a woman in the philapines he said he met in a chat room, he said he told her he loved her. He said he told her he was coming over to be with her. All along he had me and 2 small boys at home. I went nuts ofcourse but decided to forgive him and move on for the sake of our children.
Roll on to August 2010. I now discover bank statements (only 5 from different time periods) from 2006 (pre marriage) to 2010. Hundreds of pounds spent on porn and sending money to the woman in the philapines. One statement was when my first child was 3 months old. He spent 800 pounds that month 
. I had a 3rd degree tear and was struggling to cope and he could have spent that money on us, a holiday, a shopping trip. But no, he spends it on himself. At the same time he said he was skint and I paid off his car loan for him (£1100) That was out of my late mothers inheritance .
I was devastated but still didn?t chuck him out, I have little family and was just trying to work out what to do, when against ALL odds I fell pregnant with my beautiful daughter. At the same time his job went very down hill and he got very depressed. I took the children most weekends, I coped whilst he didn?t. 2011 a job came up in our home county, he went for it and got it so we moved 7 months ago. I left a job and all my friends.
Here we are in our new home and in October last year I opened my laptop and found him still logged on to a webcam sex website (cam4) He had a profile and in it he described himself as bisexual.
I have forgiven a lot but now feel unable to move past this. I do not want to have sex with him anymore (its pretty bad sex anyway tbh) and no longer trust him, he says he will not go to relate and the only reason he can give for the philapino sex worker relationship, porn, webcamming etc is his impotence and he is repressed. He says ?I don?t know why I do it, im sorry?
I also found him watching something inappropriate on his lap top in the middle of the day when our children were playing downstairs. This to me was a big line crossed.
He also uses phone lines (well has in the past) and I am pretty sure there is more I don?t know about.
So thanks if you have got this far?.
I am thinking of divorce/separation, I regret putting up with too much. But we get on ok (weird) and I do not want to upset my children (ds1 4, ds2 2.5,dd 7m) Also how the hell will I cope?
Am I being flippant? Should I just forgive and forget? He is not aggressive, violent, abusive at all, I just think he is fucked up. I do still love him but not in the same way, he has killed it.
So what to do now? He just says little except he is sorry and he loves me but his behaviour is so opposite to that. By the way we live in a great new house the kids are settled and no-one in real life (bar a couple of friends) have any idea there is a problem. His lovely parents will be devastated.
If I don?t reply straight away then apologies, if dh comes home or the kids call I will log out.
Thanks in advance for any advice or other experiences.