Is something going on?

[damnbloodyfacebook]

I feel stupid posting this thats why i have name changed, if you realise who i am please do not out me i feel stupid as it is. :(
DH is not normally a facebook user, he does have an account but rarely users it.
Lately he is on it alot.
Last time he was using facebook alot i found out he was planning an affair with an (now) ex friend of mine.
He hasnt changed in his ways that i can tell of, the one thing i have noticed is though he is liking alot of someones pictures/statuses/posts etc i have her on facebook as well as him having her on facebook too (obviously)
He used to have frequent encounters with this lass before he met me.
She posted a status on today about how bored she was and how she was going to spoon her friend and DH replied with
'ooh videos lol'

Now that could mean 'hmm yeah your fit and i deffinatley would fuck you again' or it could be jokey type. I know DH is a flirt and can joke in times like that but im just hoping that he isn't getting to that point of where he wants abit of excitement from someone else.

Please tell me i am being stupid and its nothing to worry about.
I am still jealous and bitter about the last problems with what happened with my ex mate. We no longer talk and i threatened him to the point he knew i was serious. I would have kicked him out and i would have put her in hospital. I was working all the hours god sends after suffering bad PND and id come home from working 10 hours and he'd be on the laptop, dishes in the sink and hardly any cleaning done because he was talking to her all day. Yes i do feel that he could do it again, but id like to hope not.

So please tell me i am being a stupid cow.

you sound like you have zero respect for each other. that's no way to live imo, but you and he have a choice to spend your lives as if it is a soap opera.... but what sort of example is this for your children?
you don't sound happy at all op or i'm guessing you wouldn't be posting here. you also sound defensive and angry. you need to think about how you want your life to be....

OP everyone is trying to give you advice, yes it is sometimes "tough love" and yes a lot of the time it won't be what you want to hear but honestly it really is good advice.

Did you read my first post at all? I'm not trying to project, maybe your situation is completely different from mine but the things you said led me to believe otherwise.

I'm not judging you, I'm certainly in no position to do that but it really is pointless to ask for advice then not listen to it because you don't like it.

You know he is looking to shag about if he is not doing so already

Clearly yon fellow is either pretending to believe or actually convincing himself that you are going to cheat as an excuse to do something he oughtn't - an imaginary tit for tat, if you like. Mind you I don't believe changing your mind about going to the party would make a difference. He'll just make up something else you're supposed to have done. You might as well please yourself... oh, and, yes, leave the bastard (to coin a well-used phrase).

I didn't mean to insult you. I'm sorry, I know I sound harsh but tbh you need to look at this objectively for a moment...you're chucking glasses at his head for goodness' sake.

That's not ok.
His behaviour sucks, big time - I've said that, he's a dick, you're better off without him, but throwing objects at him, and all the rest of it, threatening him, his other women and so on is really not the way to handle it. You can't change him pet.

You can't make him behave like a good person when he is just a shit.
That's why I think you should leave him.

I'm sorry you have got kids with this person. The thing is, unless he grows right up really fast, and you realise that you can't be telling him off all the time, because it won't change a thing, then I cannot see how the relationship is going to work.

Sorry for criticising you for being young, that's not fair. But you've got to see that relationships that involve petty violence, bickering constantly and huge amounts of disrespect are just really really bad for you.

He doesn't have any respect for you and you don't seem to have much for him. I hope you can find a way out of it and move on, sorry, I know it's not that easy.

i think you are in a very shitty relationship here OP. Maybe you've had worse than this, but this one is pretty appalling in its own right.

Why on EARTH would you stick with someone who was all set to shag your friend? The only reason he didn't do it was because you caught him! Why bother with someone who doesn't respect you even a little bit?

And then telling a woman he used to bonk, that he'd bonk her again? And he's still living in the same house as you after you found out he said that???

Never mind the physical assaults, etc. Did you seriously through something at his head? really?

Up till 4am? Unemployed... but sits around online all day while you're working, without lifting a finger? how can you share a house with someone like this?

I can't make head or tail of it. The whole thing is just lunacy.

Spearmint Rhino sells alcohol and sexual titillation by way of strippers and pole and lap dancers to mainly male punters.

You do know that relationships are about considerably more than power games and that they don't have to be a struggle?