Dh is working away and i'm feeling very insecure

[upthewalls]

Hi i'm i would love some tips re insecurity and jealousy. At present my DH is away for a week working with a colleague who is 22 and absolutely beautifull.
I have no reason to be suspicious and i have confided in him how difficult i find this. He couldnt have responded better by being extremely loving and understanding and has promised to keep in touch all the time. They will be spending loads of time together and will be attending a gig together monday to do some networking. I thanfully havent got annoyed at him etc as i think that makes it worse but i'm really struggling and hope i can hold the head all week and not turn into a mad person who will accuse him of all sorts. He has told me that they work very well togther and they get on well but he laughs at my suspicions as he says there is not a chance she finds him attractive and adds he wouldnt cheat on me and our girls.
How do i keep sane?

basically you have just got to trust him yes. Keep yourself busy so your not imagining stupid things, our minds sometimes work over time don't they. Have lots of things planned so your not constanly checking your phone etc. Good luck x

hmm, I can see why you didn't quite like his answer - it would be better if he said he didn't fancy HER (or anyone), regardless of her looks, rather than that she didn't fancy him but he wouldn't cheat (as in some kind of moral duty only). maybe ask him directly whether he does, and that would help if he reassures you?

Sounds like he does fancy her but wouldnt do anything cause she is not attracted to him,nice. He done a wonderful job at making you feel secure,idiot.

no it doesn't thesunshinesbrightly but congrats on making a women worrying about stuff feel even more insecure

I think you have to just believe him, I know it's really hard. But go with the most likely thing which is, from what he's said and how he's said it, that he loves his family and doesn't see her as a threat to his current happy state of being, with you.

He doesn't sound defensive at all which to me would be the warning sign...he sounds like he loves you and isn't even worried that you have thought about this, because it's not an issue. If it was I think he'd be more serious about it and not just laugh etc.

only one q, has he done anything dodgy before with anyone> that would change things obviously. If not then I think you're alright chook

You have to trust your DH.

My DH regularly works away from home. He works with bands on tour. He is often surrounded by women who are younger, more beautiful than me. I am sure he probably 'fancies' some of them in a purely non-thinking male way. However I know he has no sexual interest in them. He has told me about women throwing themselves at him in an attempt to get to meet the band. He has every opportunity going to be unfaithful but I know he never has been because he loves me.

OP don't start imagining every dodgy scenario your DH could be in with this women. Just rely on the fact that he loves you and you trust him. You clearly have a good relationship because you were able to tell him your fears and he responded appropriately.

Hi OP,

I think you need to think of this is the much longer term. You need to work on what is fabulous about YOU and why your DH married you and wants you in his life.

There is a big difference between finding someone attractive and "fancying" them.

Try not to worry but think of making yourself feel OK about you.