She knows - urgent advice needed

[VickyandAlistair]

On Wednesday last week dh and I decided on a trial separation while we sift through what used to be our marriage and try to find something salvagable. Things have been going downhill for a very long time, and we dont want to say good bye for good, but we have hurt eachother deeply lately and have decided on some space.

Problem is my MIL. She is loud, opinionated and down right scary. She knows exactly what to say and do to hurt. We werent going to tell her at all unless we decided to make the separation more permanent,but my dh has just texted me to say that he told her this morning when he was dropping ds off at hers. I have to go and pick ds up in 2 hrs and I am terrified basically. What can I say to protect myself? I know its daft being so afraid of the reaction of another person, but she is something else..

Just keep it short. Non committal answers.

Just repeat: I'm sorry, but this is really none of your business.

If variation is needed, switch to: you're probably better talking to your son about this.

Surely you can be in and out in a few minutes?

Grow some balls and tell her to mind her own business and say nothing else. If she persists, ignore her.

Be honest and tell your dh that you don't feel strong enough to deal with his mother in the circumstances so can he collect ds as he was the one who told her.

As schobe said.

'This is really none of your business.' REPEAT.

Can you take a friend with you for moral support?

You could be surprised, she may be more supportive than you think if she realises that things have got so bad for your both. I would speak to your husband again to ask him if he has told his mother that she had better not have a go at you.

Thank you all, some good advice, I will 'grow some balls' and tell her straight :)