Marriage Guidance Homework

[Whobuilt]

So, I've been asked this question 'what do you want from your marriage and what are you prepared to give' and I haven't got a clue. Seriously, maybe this is why we're having a few issues.

I wondered if you ladies would be really helpful and suggest a few ideas as I have no idea where to start. Thank you in advance x

Companionship, love, support, friendship, company...

Things in common, days out together...

A hand to hold, a shoulder to cry on. An end to loneliness.

Someone to listen, without judging, without interupting.

And be prepared to give the same?

Romance?
Stability?
Support?
Fun?
Companionship?
Sex?

What sort of things would you look for in a relationship, if you weren't already in one? What did you want out of this one at the start? How did that change over time? (eg lots of people start out with romance and fun, but stay for the companionship and stability)

O i'm crying now, that all sounds lovely but I don't seem to be getting any of that and DH is so distant, O dear.

What do you do if your husband is an emotional black hole? I don't know if my husband is capable of support, fun, stability. I think we may be in the crapper.

Well, I don't know how bad it is, or what the chances are of turning it round. But if you can work out what is top of your list of things that are missing, then it at least gives you a starting point for some discussion. And, in fairness, what you think he might want from you that isn't working well at the moment.

Best of luck with it.

But also making the ideas specific - romance - when I say, that my DH thinks he has to walk around with a rose between his teeth and book fabulous suprise weekends away, while I would be chuffed if he came home with a Fry's Chocolate Cream bar.

Thanks for your replies, I think sometimes when you're busy raising little ones and managing the day-to-day chaos it's easy to lose track of everything. Throw in sleep deprivation and bob's your aunt marital breakdown is a go-go. I think being specific is vital as DH is definitely one for exact instructions

I think I could do with sitting down and thinking through what I can give him back, I feel like I'm rummaging through the odds and ends draw though . Thanks again