Oh what to do, Im married but would you meet a bloke coz of the spark between you?

[HeadsInAMuddle]

Ok, not sure where to start but basically Ive been with my hubby nearly 12 years, married just under 10, got a few kids, we get on ok, bit monotone really if im honest, sex is as dull as dishwater, in fact I dont like doing it at first until I get going but even then its not great ( I feel bad saying all this but just being honest), we never kiss and to me I miss that, I think it means alot, we sometimes dont communicate well either, Im wondering if my love for him has changed, I do love him but I dont think in a way I maybe should.

Now the other bloke I went to school with, we liked each other at school but we didnt tell each other, teenagers huh, I did meet up with him just after I got married as needed to discuss some work he did for us at the wedding, we had a spark and Im ashamed to admit it but we did have a kiss and I still remember it now BUT we agreed to leave it and carry on with our relationships, hes popped up online a few times in the past few years but just as general chat but last night he accepted a facebook friends request from me that i sent weeks ago and had forgot about (he hardly goes on there), we emailed each other from 1am-3.30am and it was a very honest conversation of how our feelings have never gone away and hes asked to meet as friends just to see how we feel, now we are both married, he doesnt have kids, we arent going to have an affair, we just want to see how we feel and to have a chat. I know I should say a blatant no to this but a part of me wants to go.

Im not a cow really im not, i dont want my cake and eat it, if we still had a spark between us and we decided that its not gonna go away coz it hasnt after over 7 years so far then we would decide what to do next, this part terrifies me and i dont wanna think about it but is life to short to stay with someone just coz u get on and things are easy not to change it or is it worth going ahead and trying out the feelings.

Please dont slate me, I couldnt sleep last nite for thinking about it, think I had 3 hrs in all

HELP, advise please

I say go for it. You have "a few kids" Brighten up yor life and have few more with this one before he moves on to the next woman.
Hth

I can really understand the temptation you are feeling but I think if you venture further into this you will end up feeling more hurt. Once you start an affair with all the heightened emotion it involves (& from what you say it is likely not to remain platonic - it's already past that) you will not be able to get out at all easily. It will then be hard for you to know clearly whether you want to be out of your marriage or whether you've lost your way with someone else. What if you are found out? What if he doesn't leave? Will that be okay? Also if you do want to leave your marriage it is far more likely to be amicable (& better for kids) if there's not infidelity. I don't feel any judgement about your considering this but I do think it's dangerous & you are very likely to be hurt. Take care.