come and help me out, are you one of those people who just KNOWS what attracts you to others...

[timetoask]

Not sure where to put this question. I am supposed to ask people in RL this question, but too embarrassed, so I thought I'd ask you all!

Can you name 5 traits/characteristics that you feel are the most valuable in other people (those you would make an effort to befriend), and 5 traits you find in people that you tend to ignore and would never consider forming a friendship with. All honest opinions welcome and much needed.

If you're conducting this piece of 'research' for coursework or similar and you've been told to ask the question in RL - you're cheating and you may as well just make up the answers based on your personal preferences/knowledge of 'attraction' instead of getting others to do your work for you.

Pros: Kindness, good sense of humour, down to earth, intelligent (intelligence comes in many different forms), people who read, good manners, respecters of personal space of all kinds, people who have integrity, people who are comfortable in their own skins.

Cons: Putting others down/judging, people who are on some sort of mission to convert you to something/sell you something, needy people, users, people who are late, people who share tmi too soon, people who blow hot and cold, arrogance, rudeness, inconsiderate people, people who live outside themselves/are fake in some way.

I select my friends carefully, carefully vetting them before I consider them to be worthy of my friendship! (Maniacal laugh... )

I do have criteria for friends, or at least people I would consider to be true friends. I look for:

Reliability, consideration, empathy. Trustworthiness. A great sense of humour, a strong sense of fun. Someone with a positive mindset who makes me feel uplifted and sometimes excited after being with them. Shared interests are a bonus. Someone I can just be myself with and not worry too much about what I've said toI much after seeing them. Emotional and social intelligence. I don't mind a bit of cynicism. Someone who stimulates my mind.

Things that turn me right off:

Social snobbery (money and a posh education will not make me like you more), liars, inconsistency, unreliability, emotional vampires. Anyone I have to second-guess myself when around.