H left us this morning , what do I do?

[Theglassiscompletelyempty]

After spending a night on the sofa he left this morning for his parents. I don't know what to do. Things have not been good for quite a while, but I still love him very much and want to be with him.We've only been married 2.5 years but after we were married it's like he stopped bothering to try. He says he loves me but itn't in love with me to want to be intimate. He is asexual and most of his relationships have ended with the woman going off with someone else. But I don't want someone else, I want him to want to love me.

DS eating toast and watching Peppa Pig. I feel so empty. Please someone tell me it's going to be ok.

I am sorry op if he was a very nice man who is does his best he would seek the help he, and you, need to try and make the marriage work. Time to remove those rose tinted glasses and get angry!

Come on he is that determined at work but is willing to do nothing for his family!

It isnt at all surprising that he is nice in many ways. It is about a detached self- two halves. He is probably not happy either.

But he can choose to look at his own issues and acknowledge them, and sort them out. And he isnt.

Ah, so the warning signs were there even before you got married.
A common theme on MN.
Sorry this happened to you but....people rarely change....

I don't know about a possible affair or not, but if he's genuinely asexual then you only have three options:

1. Split up.
2. Have a sexless marriage.
3. Have an open marriage.

Be prepared that you are unable to separate sex from emotional attachment, then option 3 will not work as you'd end up in a full-blown affair and want to split anyway (though you could have a one night stand only rule to try to avoid this).

Option 4 - where he suddenly changes his mind and is able to offer you the sexual intimacy you crave (and deserve) - is not a real option.

So, H has had ds for the first time over night at his parents house. The place seems to empty. I've talked a lot to friends some married, some separated, some single. Has helped to get my head on straight, but I'm still totally devastated. I was very calm and cool about ex H (I'll have to get use to calling him that) picking ds up, we were playing when he arrived and didn't stop just because he entered the house.

I'm not trying to get on with my school work, but cant' concentrate. I dyed my hair mahogany last night to distract myself, but my acne has got worse with all the stress and even with cover up on I just feel gross.

I keep thinking about stupid things, lie what we're going to at Xmas. I know it's such a long way away, but Xmas is a really big deal for me and my family. It lasts for days, with different people visiting and I can't bare to think about ds not being around for all the fun because he has to go and see his dad.:0(

Sorry, I know I'm rambling. On plus side have lost all the weight I'd put on from eating too much fried chicken and Burger Kings during my trip to Hungary the week before half term.