Are there really any 'whole package' partners out there?

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I mean, women who have found men (or visa versa or same sex, whatever) where your partner is the perfect match for you?! Beginning to wonder if compromise is the key here. I have recently had three 'flings' all of which have felt deep an meaninful at the time.
Partner 1) he was my first love and we met again after both having a shit time of it and it felt amazing to ber with him, funny, kind, good looking, caring etc. But very very overweight which was offputting (shallow of me i know but.....) I broke it off with him because it was going too fast
Partner 2) - funny, good looking, caring, understood all my neurosis and anxiety issues etc, but was way too needy. He wanted full on relationship etc but I am not there yet so I dispatched him back into the arms of a previous g/f
Partner 3) not my type really, not suited background wise or outlook wise but he was sooooo fucking sexy! He 'played' me and then told me he was giving it another try with his ex. There were no feelings there from me really. So no heartbreak.

Now I am seeing partner 1 for a date on Sat and wondering if it is possible to package up all three and find them in ONE person!

Yes, it is perfectly possible, but everyone has annoying things about them. It just depends on what you allow to get in the way of a good relationship or not.
Overweight wouldn't put me off. Far right views would. I can cope with wet towels being left all round the house, as that doesn't bother me to pick them up, but I could NOT be with anyone who was mean with money.

Just out of interest, how old are you? If you are under 30, go out and carry on having fun etc. If you have hit an age where you want to settle down, dont' comprimise - if partner 1's weight put you off, it will drive you mad down the line. It's not shallow, who wants a very overweight partner who may keel over at some point, and not being rude, but how would you feel doing the deed with someone you do not find physically attractive:(I wouldn't' bother wasting your time and leading him on. Don't comprimise too much on finding a partner , but I do wonder if Mr Perfect exists:) Good luck finding him:) x

I am mid-late 40's, widowed, two children. I am not looking to live with someone, but I would like that special someone in my life. I am not even looking, these men have just sort of come out of the woodwork! Two of them are from my past but only one is an ex (actually, technically, they are all exes now I guess . - what a tart! ) Just wondering if I am looking for something./someone that does not exist ?

You could be looking for your husband...

Maybe you need more time for yourself, or just move on. THE person may well come along in the meantime.

Lueji - Im certainly not looking for my husband, a depressive, alcoholic with controlling behaviours . I am looking for quite the opposite. Or maybe I am just not looking.

Ok, the thought did occur... :(

I guess you do have your ideal man in your head and no one has ticked the boxes.

But that probably says you are not in love with any of them. Just have a good time and mr right may well come. :)

I'm not sure about whole packages - everyone has their faults - but I certainly think there's no point for settling for someone who doesn't meet certain criteria. The basics would be someone who makes me feel good, whose company I enjoy, who does his fair share and who I actively want to shag.

Keep looking.

kodachrome - I am enjoying seeking (or being sought should I say ) and I have wanted to shag them all so far!

I don't think there is someone who is 'the whole package', and I think it's dangerous to think there is because you'll only ultimately disappoint yourself.

It's absolutely fine to have 20% that drives you nuts as long as there's 80% to keep your attention.

Even the fat one?

Maybe you could put him on a diet (not serious - it'd be a mistake going into it hoping to change him).

kodachrome -yes even the fat one!!!! . He is actually gorgeous looking and a fantastic man in every other respect and I remember him from when he was young and slim. I had to cast my mind back!

Agree with Unimaginativedad. Ad you are probably 80% too, like the rest of us!

Depends what issues you are willing to compromise on.

fiventhree - very good point. I am probably nearer 70%!! Very good point.

with partner 1 - there wouldn't really need to be any compromise. Except that he would have to slooooow doooowwwnn and let me take things at my own pace instead of being so full on which scares me to death.

#1 and #2 both wanted a more serious relationship than you did.

#3 wanted less of a relationship than you did.

Is it possible that there is a very very narrow band of how full-on a relationship you want? The narrower the band the less likely you are to find someone who you find attractive and get on well with and they want exactly the same level of commitment that you do.

My husband is extraordinarily lucky to have found me. I am completely perfect.

silentboob - . Love that