I have been married for 14 years (second time for both of us). My DH told me when we met that his first marriage had broken down mainly because his wife didn?t want to have sex with him after the birth of their second child. He said she repeatedly told him to leave her alone and find someone else to have sex with.
As a contractor who works away from home all week, he had plenty of opportunity to take her advice and effectively set up home, Monday to Friday, with OW on other side of the country. He has hinted that he did this with a subsequent OW.
When his wife found out she was enraged and threw him out and divorced his for adultery. He says he was amazed at her reaction as she had ?told him to find someone else.?
I have met her on several occasions and I know she had severe post natal depression after her last child. The whole family spent time in a residential family therapy unit to try and address their problems, but she kept running away. She has told me she always felt guilty about not wanting sex with him.
In recent years we have had a series of problems ? bereavements, trouble with adult children (we are not young).
On many occasions DH has told me that if I didn?t want sex with him he would find someone who does. He says sex is the most important thing in marriage. I seem to have become gradually very depressed and have lost interest in many of the things I used to enjoy. We argue all the time, mainly because I feel so guilty about my lack of desire.
So, I feel as though DH WANTS me to say ?go ahead then, have sex with someone else.? I don?t think he has done so but I sometimes feel as though history is repeating itself.
Obv I only have his side of the story in any detail and DH is a good man in many ways. The thing is I feel so bad about myself most of the time and am becoming irritable and snappy with DH.
Sorry to ramble on, but thanks for listening.