I need urgent advice for a friend who isn't on mumsnet

[LovelyLizzie]

OK, I'll try to keep it brief.
Friend is around my age, a bit younger maybe? Early forties.
She has managed to get herself knocked up by some guy she met on the internet. This guy is a total player, is on every dating site going.

She's in bits because she doesn't have children. This could be her last chance. The guy is being an absolute arse. She asked him point blank what he wanted to do, whether he or his family wanted to be involved etc. All he kept saying is "lets wait and see" and "I can't tell you now, I have no idea what the future holds, sorry".

The future holds his kid if she waits much longer for a termination.
WTF? This guy is 38. How do I get her to see this isn't a fairly tale? I seriously think she is waiting for prince charming to kick in.
Oh, god.....
thank you
Lizzie

Thanks everyone. I'm a bit calmer this morning.
I think she is considering a termination because she is scared. She has no family to speak of and not many friends. She also has a full time job and is mortaged to the hilt although I've told her that she can get child maintainance.
She will have my support, obviously, whatever she decides.
Thanks again
Lizzie

here, this thread is about a young woman in a similar situation. Might help you and your friend to read it, there is some good advice on there about where to go for help.

in theory she can get child maintenance - in practice it may not be so eg if he self employed and has a clever accountant. she should not rely on his maintenance. i had Dc with someone who adh a good job - years down the line he has no job (severe MH issues) and i am solely responsible as single parent.

but - she could down size, etc etc etc.

Hi everyone, just a quick update.
Friend lost the pregnancy at nine weeks. Not uncommon in women her age I understand.
She is gutted but staying strong and is with her family.
Shit for brains is no where to be seen, she has tried calling him but he wont take her calls. She sent him a text saying she'd misscarried and got a one line text back saying "thanks for letting me know". According to another friend he has several women on the go.
Thank you to everyone who took the time to offer advice
Liz x

Aw Lizzie, I'm glad she has you for a friend.