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Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

am i being over emotional?

10 replies

confuzed90 · 01/02/2012 11:55

Changed name for this.I'm 28 weeks pregnant, don't have the best self-esteem going.and a few months ago, I find my partner txting someone else, from work. Wev been together 4 years and he's lied to me a lot and there's always been one thing after another. Again not lot ago I found he had been on a dating site, his profile read "single and looking for fun and possible serious relationship" and then this morning I have found loads of girl on girl porn, really upset because he knows how I feel about it. He had hid it in baby to be cupboard right at back. I have gone mad, very very hurt and angry.am I over reacting? Burst into tears, and told him its over, Its always something then another.constant lies, going behind my back.

OP posts:
woollyideas · 01/02/2012 11:56

I think your reaction is perfectly understandable. Hope you're okay...

rubyrubyruby · 01/02/2012 11:57

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

TooEasilyTempted · 01/02/2012 12:08

Whilst I watch and enjoy porn, I find something quite unsavoury about your DH storing it in the baby's cupboard Confused. But anyway, that's the least of your problems. Your reaction is completely understandable. Where is he now? Has he gone?

kodachrome · 01/02/2012 12:32

He doesn't sound like a good bet - he has already crossed several lines and if he hasn't been unfaithful yet it's not for want of trying. Not to mention how stupid (almost as if he wanted you to find the porn) to put that stuff in the baby-to-be cupboard. I think he likes your low self-esteem.

Chances are, if you stay with him, this will be a constant cycle. It's not a happy future.

windsorTides · 01/02/2012 12:36

No you're not over-reacting. If you stay with this man, your life will be forever tainted, as will your children's lives. I hope that if you are still having sex, you're protected up to the hilt and please ask your midwives for an STI test, so that you can protect your own health and that of your unborn baby. It is very likely that your partner has been unfaithful already.

confuzed90 · 01/02/2012 13:14

I don't think he has been unfaithful, but there is a good chance, as when DS1 was born he wasn't there with me he was in france for 2 weeks. And I can't even talk to him about that as it upsets me, he was meant to be on a course for work, but I saw photos of him getting drunk in clubs with his friends.he new hed miss the birth.

OP posts:
LadyMedea · 01/02/2012 13:26

This does not sound like a loving supportive relationship - that's what you deserve. Don't keep being a doormat, you deserve to be respected and considered.

Do the right thing now, leave before you future DC has to live with this man

confuzed90 · 01/02/2012 19:31

He's packed his bags and left, without hesitation, left DS1 crying for him. I am starting to think I'm overreacting.

OP posts:
OcarinaOfTime · 01/02/2012 19:48

I don't think you are overreacting. You might not be ready for the result, but who ever is. I think he wants to leave, and he's wanted to leave for a long time, and all this behaviour has been a way to be made to leave without actually doing it for himself. You need to find a way to care of yourself now, it doesn't sound like he's ever been at all supportive anyway. I am sorry for what you are going through. It is so hard.

CupOfBrownJoy · 01/02/2012 19:54

Relationships are meant to make you happy, and yours just kind of sounds like it makes you sad Sad

If he has left without hesitation, is it really worth fighting for?

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