When your DC and your friend's DC no longer get on

[bunnyspoiler]

I've known my friend for a long time. My DD and her DS are the same age (8). We've seen them very regularly since they were born, been on holiday together, etc. Her DS has hyperactive behaviour and odd interaction (he's never been formally diagnosed and his mum is in denial), which has become more noticeable over the years. My DD finds him a little overwhelming, he is constantly trying to kiss her on the mouth, for example, which his mum doesn't stop. She's a kind little girl and usually sees the best in everyone but she doesn't want to see him, and arranging days out is becoming difficult as she gets upset. So we're just seeing them less often. Arranging to meet up without the DC is fairly impossible. Anyone any experience of this, what should I do? Feel an awkward situation developing.

As you are good friends with his mum, would you feel comfortable telling him that it's not appropriate to kiss your dd, and other little girls, on the mouth in front of his mum?

Apart from anything 8 is about the age when dd want to play with other dd and not with ds. That could give you a 'reason' for them not wanting to play together any more that wouldn't hurt your friend if that is bothering you.

yes tb you are right, I need to stand up for DDs boundaries re the kissing thing. It's hard as his mum just laughs and of course there is nothing sinister, more that developmentally he is much younger than DD and he doesn't pick up on her cues. Plus he is much bigger and stronger and physically she can't push him off easily.

Although DD chooses to play with the girls at school, outside of school my friends are all mums of boys. This boy is the only one she has a problem with, we are constantly seeing the others, and we all know each other so the second suggestion is good but won't work so much.

Thank you!

Btw, I meant saying it in front of his mum, not that he shouldn't kiss on the mouth in front of his mum.

Glad you read it the way I meant it.

Have to say that it's a pet hate of mine - ie adults kissing children on the mouth, makes me feel all squirmy.

Yes, me too. I hate being kissed myself by people not in my immediate family. Let alone a dribbly smacker on the lips!

It happens OP. My DS is now 14 and it's just how it is. Unless you are very good friends with the boys mum meetings will just get less and less. By 8 years old children really are beginning to choose their own friends.

Yes, it's sad isn't it? I don't remember this happening when I was younger, i was always happy and excited to hang out with mum's friends' kids while the parents nattered.