Spidey Senses Tingling - Do I have myself a potential stalker here?

[PofNovice]

So I joined POF in the new year, got talking to a few guys, nobody I really clicked with apart from one guy so a)lives near me and b) goes to my uni although I've never seen him (tbf the uni is massive so unlikely anyway)

He sent me his mobile number over the website. I don't normally give mine out but I did this time and he text me straight away with xx on the end of every message. Thing is if I didn't reply to his message within an hour or so he'd send another text asking how I was, what I was up to etc - seemingly anything to get a reply. Then he started asking if he could ring me. I HATE speaking on the phone so put him off and told him why. He still insisted on calling me. I ignored the phone and instead asked if he fancied meeting up in the uni for a coffee. He agreed but he's been texting me that much that he's putting me off. He texts me every day and if I don't reply, he texts me again. Yesterday I just couldn't be bothered with it and didn't reply at all. Later on the night he sent me a text saying "So now I'm being ignored for some reason?" so I replied I wasn't ignoring him but don't tend to be glued to my phone all day. He replied with "ok goodnight." I thought he'd finally got bored of me but today - more texts. "Hi, how are you?" "are you ok?" "are you alive? lol" "can I call you?" and now he just sent me a text saying "goodnight x". I replied "night" and he's sent another one saying "do you not like me or something?"

wtf? we've never even met. Is it me? am I trying to play it TOO cool?

No, it isn't you. He's pushing boundaries and you aren't comfortable with it. There's nothing wrong with feeling that way.

I can just imagine him being the kind of guy where if I'm 5 minutes late home its "where have you been? who with? how come I couldn't see you there when I drove past?"

Imagination running away with me but he seems so 'full on' considering he doesn't even know me.

Run run run away! Unless you like needy guys... Personally I don't, totally get on my tits. My ex was needy and if I didn't text back quickly then he would be phoning me. I couldn't even watch the tv in peace... He would start edging over in front of me with his face so I couldn't see the tv. I know you dont know this guy well yet but if he's going to get all insecure because you haven't text him back for a bit then you will be in for a difficult time.

I could be wrong but I've experienced guys like this :-/ worst boyfriend ever!

Chilled out secure guys are sooo much better btw ;)

He's sent you how many texts? A guy you haven't even met yet? No coffee for me, I'd be be incommunicado for sure.

He's young - he may not have a clue about how he's coming across. Maybe let him know that uni life is full on and that the constant texting is making you feel pressured when in fact you haven't even met yet. His response to that will tell you a lot. Either he'll back off a bit or he'll show he is def not boyfriend material as far too clingy / needy.

He isn't that young, he's 33. He's actually older than me. After I replied last night I'm generally too busy to text too much during the day he replied "What I mean is, I text you, you reply, I reply and then nothing. It's like you're not bothered xx" wtf? he's never even met me! if a woman acted like this with a bloke she'd never met could you imagine the bunny boiler accusations?

Does he know what you do at Uni? I would block his number. Don't even try and rationalise, listen to your spidey senses, they are generally not wrong. At 33, what is he doing chasing young ones in uni (I presume you not as old but not 18). No nicey nicey, just radio silence, he will draw you into various discussions that will end up in all sorts of circles. Tell him firmly in a text that you do not want his attention, no more texts, please desist. Very clear.
By the way, see how sensible it is not to give out numbers, stick to your rules, they are there for a reason like this guy.

I'm 30 so only a few years younger but I do agree, giving out phone numbers is a no no. See out of the 4 guys I was talking to, three of them wanted to swap numbers so I started wondering if that was the done thing these days.

He does know what I do yes, so potentially could quite easily find me

Get a cheap PAYG phone and use that for your internet dating. It's a sensible precaution that a lot of women who use dating sites employ.

Are you still going to meet up with him? If you've gone off the idea(and no one would blame you!), how in the heck are you going to get rid?! He sounds stickier than chewing gum in your hair.

No totally gone off the idea. In fact I've gone off the idea of online dating completely. I'm sure there are a few good eggs but I can't be bothered with all the nutters. I should be concentrating on my career really, not messing around with people like this. I'll just have to rely on meeting someone the normal way.

Not sure how to get rid other than just ignore his texts - I'm pretty much expecting a load of verbal abuse though when he realises I AM ignoring him.

Good call, he certainly sounds like a potential nutter. Yes, just ignore ignore ignore, that's all you can do. Good luck.

Send me round. you won't get no more nonsense. I shall scare the buggering shit out of the poor wee man. Guaranteed. I am firm