Letter to those who don't want to know me any more

[imsorryifiupsetyou]

Dear Beth, Sarah, Martine, Jessica, Debbie & Kirsty,

None of you know each other which means the problem is ME.

I was hoping you would understand that what happened to me has changed me as a person. You all individually knew I used to be positive but that experiences changed my confidence & belief in people.

I was hoping you would bear with me while I tried to come to terms with stuff. I am sorry if I pushed you away.

I am sorry you all feel you no longer want contact with me. Two of you have told me we no longer have friendships. Thankyou for your honesty KB & MC - I do appreciate that.

It is clear that this is not in my head. Beth I know you have ended our friendship from the way I found out you had moved house. Sarah, I don't know what I said to upset you but clearly something has happened. You enjoy your new puppy. DF - Thankyou for your support at a crucial & sad time in my life. Jess - It wasn't my fault. One day when certain people aren't around any more I will get in touch & explain.

Thankyou for being there through the shit. I am sorry it changed me for the worse.

You are all special in your individual ways....look after yourselves & be happy.

Friendly hug. Over & out.

op, whats happened that you have to send this.

Sounds like you're having a pretty shit time.

I (at least I think I did) had something similar happen to me where at a horrible time in my life I was deserted by my so called friends. I can honestly say it was for the best. Becasue of there actions, I ended up joining a club where I met my now husband.

It took me a long time to realise it but they were a bunch of bitches, not friends.

Anyway, not sure if that helps you or not, but didn't want your post to be ignored

OP, are you going to see a counsellor to talk this through? Whatever's behind it it sounds like you very much need to talk about it.

Things happened to me & it changed me.

I've lost everyone.

My counselling sessions on the NHS finished (I had 4) & I can't afford private sessions.

Thankyou for posting.

see if you can find a local counselling charity org type thing in your area - theres one in bristol called network and they dont charge much. might be worth asking nhs counsellor if they know of any

can you talk about what happened here?.

What caused them to abandon you OP?

I will have a look. Thankyou.

I can't say what happened. I signed a legally binding confidentiality agreement. I had to sign it so I would be compensated for the way they treated me.

It's not just that. That was the straw that broke the camels back. I used to be a really nice person. I don't know how to get that back. Can't trust anyone now after these friends failed me or I failed them. I was hoping they would help me recover but they've all gone.

Am so incredibly sad.

There's something called PSS - look at their website - that operates in certain parts of the country and I know someone who was counselled by them for free.

If you are a student, in any capacity,you would be able to get free counselling. It might even be worth signing up to a cheap evening course (some under £50 near me) to get that.

Or, go back to your GP and stress how unhappy you are and that you need more help.

How far back does the original event go? How many years?

Affordable counselling is in operation in the West ?Midlands and Solihull. Very cheap with experienced counsellors. In time you'll realise you are better off without them. Real friends don't abandon each other easily. Good luck, you are lovely :)