I've written in another thread about the constant put downs/nasty comments (my weight, choice of job, house, friends) I've recieved from my mum during the course of my life and how she was always defended by my father because I was apparantly 'too sensitive'.
I wasn't too sensitive, she got great pleasure from making me unhappy and my father either though this was normal or didn't know how to stop it.
They have both helped me out finacially over the years and I think in her mind she thinks that gives her the right to treat me like shit.
I call her on it now. If she mentions anything negative I tell her not to be so rude (yay me 
).
Anyway, I mentioned her 'gobbing off' (hate that phrase but it fits the bill) about a girl in a restaurant not using the disabled slope and instead carrying her push chair up the stairs. Basically, my mum started shouting 'Well she's STUPID. Why doesn't she use the SLOPE? Although she is BLONDE, I wonder if there's any BRAIN CELLS in there at all?'
The girl either didn't hear or didn't say anything but myself (blonde) and my beautiful little boy (also blonde) certainly did.
My little boy was clearly upset and on the way home I really didn't know what to say to him. He already came home from my mums house asking if he was 'fat' so I think instead of me she's decided he's the easier target.
I don't particularly want to see her again. I could put up with the mean comments about me but not ones that will upset my son and I certainly can't put up with her shouting about nice people who are trying to have a meal out.
But should I mention it to my dad? If this 'gobbing off' at people has become a regular thing then sooner or later she's going to get a whalloping from someone. Maybe some people will sit quietly but others certainly won't.
And how do I avoid her? I really, really don't want her around my son if she's a) going to pick on him and b) pick on other people in front of him. If I tell her how I feel then she'll laugh at me and not take me seriously but I know from experience that it's the little digs which build up and cause the problems.
I don't want to break contact with my dad. We get on well. I've gotten over him parrotting about me being too sensitive, mostly because I've had to and also because I think he's so used to her nastiness that he doesn't realise how bad it is. He's also getting older (15 year aged gap between them although she's lazy so he does everything for her) and I don't know how much longer he'll be around for.
I'm really upset about all of this and I don't know what to do.