Help/advice please. Ex-hubby is taking me to court tmrrw to try to take the kids HELP

[Godetia]

Hi,

I got court papers through the door last night and have to appear in court tomorrow. My ex-hubby is trying to get full residence of my two small children.
I'm a normal kind of mum, on anti-depressants due to the dreadful marriage relationship and a full-time job. Off work with stress at the moment.

What sort of things should I expect tomorrow? I'm scarerd they'll level some nasty questions and accusations which will have me in tears.

All support and advice will be gratefully received as I feel so alone and isolated.

Many thanks in advance for kind thoughts

Thinking of you OP. Hope today went well.

Hi Everyone,

Thanks for all the kind words and advice, they helped keep be calm and reassured me that today would be tough but not unbearable.

I found a barrister and she was worth her weight in gold! She was so helpful and sympathetic. She knew the judge, again very helpful.

Cafcas will now be involved, which I think will be a good thing. And contact arrangements have been accepted that I am comfortable with.

Unfortunately the ex is still going ahead with his application for sole residence. This seems a spiteful act, rather than concern for our children.

Once again, thank you for your support

Hope you've got the barrister's card!!

Your ex is undoubtedly motivated by spite but hopefully this will become evident in the course of Cafcas's investigations.

Has the Court set a date for a full Hearing of your ex's application?

Do you have a solicitor?

Hold this thought OP: abusers who use court action as a means of harassing their XPs tend to come unstuck pretty quickly. It sounds like there is plenty of evidence that your X is using these actions out of a wish to distress you rather than concern for the DC, particularly as there is already a restraining order against him. So stay as calm as you can, remember that just because he takes legal action doesn't mean he's going to get his own way, and if he carries on launching court actions as a form of harassment, he will be the one who ends up behind bars.

my violent, controlling exp has been taking me to court for the last 8 years, despite always having contact, and he almost always comes off worse!

If only, sgb. Some abusive assholes know to play the legal system and, even though they may not win, they put their exes through unnecessary and often expensive hell without penalty.