Quick question

[lonelyandconfused10]

Name changed for this. Had words with H earlier in the week about New Year's Eve. He asked if we were doing anything - we weren't at that point and I suggested various things we could do - eg see friends or go to a local pub running a ticket-only New Year event (none of which I had much enthusiasm for). I wondered as I was saying this whether he had something particular in mind and later said that if he was thinking of doing xyz, then I didn't want to do that, and gave my reasons, which upset him. Then the following day I received a text from a friend inviting us and dcs to spend NY eve with them. Mentioned it to him - he shrugged andsaid I could go if I wanted to. DD otherwise busy, DD doesn't want to go (he is old enough to leave at home) and I have just asked H if he will be coming and he said no.

So what do I do - go alone (which might cause problems with H, and would look odd to my friends) or stay at home with H (letting my ffriends down and also looking odd)?

Suggestions please... :-(

So he wasn't allowed to do xyz and was upset, but you get to do what you want?

I would stay home tbh because if it was the other way round and e had done xyz you would be feeling annoyed and resentful...

Sounds like you poured cold water on his suggestion so he's doing the same to you!

Sorry I'm not entirely clear - he suggested doing something for NYE, you said no, he was upset and then you added insult to injury by telling him you had an offer from someone else and you were doing that instead? Is that right? Because if it is you have been very mean and I wouldn't have been so calm in your DH's position.

No, he didn't suggest doing anything actually, but I suspected he was going to suggest something he knew I wouldn't want to do, so tried to pre-empt this before he set about trying to make arrangements.

The invitation from my friend came completely out of the blue and it is a shame it hadn#t come about a couple of days earlier.

So you gave him a list of things you were prepared to but didn't have much enthusiasm for and then told him a list of things that you weren't prepared to do think he's just hacked off with you and even if he fancies havin a drink at your friends house tonight he isn't going to now because you pissed him off

Thanks for the replies, anyway, it is useful to have a different point of view. Glad I namechanged - there is more to this but I didn't want to be too specific.