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Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Flip

Original poster

Why does this keep happening?

7 replies

Putthatbookdown · 27/12/2011 19:01

I have been here 20 odd years and everyone just wants to push my boundaries . I am respectable, polite ,friendly and intelligent but people just wants to use me.Rarely bothermy Gp and yet one time I do he can't be bothered. Friendly to a colleague: next thing she has brought her friend round who is after something. Joined a dancing group: no really friendly but asking me togo on a regular basis but theyare not friendly people. The men try topull a fast one so I keep away from them. Constant pressure to go to local places but when I get there the place is not v interesting/not very full/peopleunfriendly What is wrong?

OP posts:

itsxmascryingagain · 27/12/2011 19:18

Unrealistic expectations, maybe?

beckieperk · 27/12/2011 19:27

Where are you from? And where is 'here'?

BurntWitch · 27/12/2011 19:32

I know what you mean. Just gotta keep on smiling!

ameliagrey · 27/12/2011 20:06

you sound rather "edgy".
what do you mean been here 20 years- in another country or in the UK from another country?

I'd suggest that you don't get so down if people are not acting as you want, and also not to sound so bitter and aggressive- it is how you come over here.

Original poster

Putthatbookdown · 27/12/2011 21:24

thanks Burntwitch - you understand ! xxx

OP posts:

MigratingChestnutsOnAnOpenFire · 27/12/2011 21:30

good! cos i'm not sure I understand

ameliagrey · 27/12/2011 22:03

OP well you aren't exactly telling the rest of us much are you- if you want help?
if all you want is someone to say "yeah, that's how it is for me" it won't really move you forward much.

If everyone you meet seems to cold shoulder you, or try to take advantage, I do think you need tolook to yourself as to why.

It doesn't mean you are doing anything wrong- but your attitude as shown here seems very negative. I've joined groups and clubs where no one was that friendly- so I stopped going if I didn't like the activity and found another one.

On the other hadn, if you are giving out certain signals, it could be why people are not behaving towards you as you'd want.

Al drs have "off" days- they are human. it doesn't mean it's personal to you.

You seem to take every small set back as personal- in mnay instances it won't be.

I think you would benefit from some personal "life" coaching to help you change your mindset into something that is less negative.

Flip