Hmmmmm....I'm wondering if i should be suspicious?

[tiredemma]

something has been on my mind all morning. stick with me you will understand why..

We all got up at 6.45 am this morning (me, dp, DS1 and ds2) everything is as normal as any other day, Dp gets himself ready and I get ds2 ready for him to take to nursery. They go off and leave at 7.15am.
I then start to get myself ready and ds1 ready to take to school. At about 7.30am, the phone rings,
" hello" ( me)
" morning" (dp)
" erm..morning" ( me frowning- he only left 15 mins ago)
" oh..er. hello...erm, xxxxx has left his reading bag in car" (dp)
" ok, its not a problem " (me)
we then say goodbye to eachother.

so here i am now at home ( working this afternoon) and dp has phoned me now about 4x for various unimportant things and keeps asking me if im ok.

looking back at conversation on phone this morning, i am becoming increasingly more paranoid that he phoned me by mistake and had intended to phone someone else, when i go over the conversation in my head he sounded as if he was "greeting" someone else- why would he ring me 15 mins after he left and wish me good morning?

am i paranoid or would you be suspicious?

with a dh who has f*'d up before i'd say yes, i'm a suspicious cow but, so my opinion is tilted in that direction.

if dh has given you no other reason to doubt him or be suspicious its probably ok

but if concerned, use you female intuition and keep your antennas out for a while.....

Well, I would guess he was just distracted and forgot who he was calling and why (I do it all the time, and especially when driving and therefore concentrating on something else!). And if you then sounded funny to him on the phone (possibly?) then he has got the heebiejeebies and is trying to work out what he has done wrong, hence why he keeps asking you if you are ok.

Could you call him now, just to hear his reaction? That might give something away.(?)

miaou, that was my thought tbh, that he wasnt really paying any attention when i answered the phone.

I know it's easier in hindsight, but I think I would've said 'you sound like you phoned me by mistake' or 'what are you doing phoning me when you only let a few minutes ago?', but that's just me.

I don't think this in itself is enough to be suspicious about, imo.

Does he often ask if you are ok if he thinks you are in a huff? Or is that unusual behaviour for him?

he doesnt normally keep phoning me at home.
tbh, i dont know when he would find time to conduct an affair- there are a few girls that work for him, but unless something was actually going on at work, he would be unable to do anything outside of work as if he is not there he is here, ( he is not from where we live now so has no close friends here).

i dont know, i suppose its caught me a bit off guard, i will ask him though tonight when i come home from work if it was me he had intended to phone. i know he would ask me if it was the other way around.

dont stress too much until then, i'm sure it'll be fine x

Have you been sad or worried about anything lately. Is there any reason why he might be more concerned than usual about you?

maybe he's just having a bad day?
I know I'm scatterbrains when tired

bugsy, no ive had lots of exams lately and interviews for uni's which has stressed me out, but not sad or down.

i think im being paranoid, i will keep my blinkers on, it would be the last thing that i could ever imagine him doing.

Blimey, I thought I could be insecure ....

If something this simple can make you suspicious, you don't have much trust in him do you?

easy, do you think im bing pathetic?

I would say that it's nothing to worry about if he's given you no other reason to be suspicious.

I don't think you're being pathetic. Never underestimate female intuition. If you feel that something is wrong, you should go with that feeling and just keep an eye on him for a while. Could be that he's planning something, might not be an affair at all. Keep your radar out, could be time for a bit of snooping just to put your mind at rest.

Have you had previous partners be unfaithful or something?

This totally wouldn't make me suspicious, but if it's making you suspicious, I'm wondering whether this is caused by something your DH did before, something someone else did before, or what.

perhaps he keeps ringing because he's suspicious of you and wants to make sure you are not having your wicked way with the meter reader!

Seriously, doesn't sound like anything, maybe he has noticed you are stressed re your exams and is concerned about you.

NQC, he was unfaithful, at the beginning of our relationship 7 yrs ago. I have no reason to believe that he had done anything again, i do trust him, i would never think that he would go behind my back again, more so now that we have the boys.

i know im being paranoid, but only because he sounded surprised to hear my voice at the end of the phone. but maybe he was not paying attention when he pphoned me.

very very well put anniemac

anniemac. he often says that ive become complacent and take him for granted, maybe he is trying to scare me!

can i get this straight? he cheated 7 years ago? and today he calls you 15mins after leaving for work, then calls several times to check you are ok?

maybe he is just checking you are ok, and maybe he did mean to call you to say x left his bookbag in the car, i have often sounded surprised or distracted when i answer the phone as something else also has my attention (usually dd2 screeching at me).

maybe if you have stayed together for 7 years after the affair its time to trust him fully.

Hi Emma, from what you have said I think that it is quite likely that he rang you and then forgot what he was doing when you answered. I know I have done that plenty of times before now.

That said, I probably would be a little suspicious, and ask him outright if he did mean to call you or not. I think then that judging by his reaction to the question, you will get a good idea of if you need to worry.