Fed up - DH and alcohol

[OnemorningXmasCockMonkey]

Our first Christmas on our own. Bucks fizz for breakfast, then he's pouring wine faster than I can drink it (and I like a drink).

By the time dinner is ready he's away with the fairies and barely ate anything. I told him to fuck off to bed as he was off his face, now he's asleep and I'm downstairs on my own.

I love him dearly, but I hate it when he drinks because he changes from the smart guy I married to an idiot. He's a happy drunk, but that's almost irrelevant because he's still a drunk.

I'm not sure what to do. I'm so disappointed in him.

I rather suspect he's an alcoholic, Bluddy. So I'm not surprised, really. Just really hurt that no matter how loving he is, or how much he tells me he loves me, the booze always wins. He seems to be drinking more lately. Well before we married I dumped him because of his drinking but he pulled himself together, now it's rare for him to spend an evening not drinking.

I'm not sure what to. I love him dearly, and he's a wonderful guy, but I can't stand the grinning, clumsy idiot his drinking turns him into. I'm wondering if I should walk away :(

My previous H was an (abusive) alcoholic. I seem to pick them.

If you knew it was likely to be a problem, why did you start the day with bucks Fizz? Surely you could have engineered the day to start drinking later on a full stomach?

Jalopy, I think it's the triumph of hope over experience. I hoped it would be okay.

He drinks so quickly that the early start is almost irrelevant. If he's started later he'd be smashed later, and I'd have been on here later.

Well, spell it out to him then.

I'm printing off information about reasons for divorce - unreasonable behaviour includes excessive drinking. We had serious words a couple of weeks ago as he'd got drunk when I was out one evening and had fallen over and injured himself for the umpteenth time.

I've told him how I feel, but he describes drinking as something he has no control over. He'd better find control, fast, because I'd rather be alone than nursemaiding an(other) alcoholic.

I understand very much the optimism over experience point of view! You are obviously well aware of the patterns if you have had a previous relationship with an A. Sorry you're going through this, I know what a let down it can be. As I'm sure you are aware you can't change anything apart from what you're prepared to put up with. All best to you.