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Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Original poster

What on earth should I do?

59 replies

sillysanta · 19/12/2011 14:19

I have name changed for obvious reasons.

This has been the most mortifying morning of my life. Please help. Sorry in advance if this is a bit long and garbled!

Just popped to SiL (dh sister) house to drop off christmas presents as she and family are off to her dh parents in London for christmas. There was no answer at the front door so I popped round the back to put the presents in the shed. I noticed a ladder up to the open bedroom window at the back and the back door slightly open. Thinking they had been robbed, or were in the middle of being robbed I looked through the kitchen window ready to scarper to see SiL and the window cleaner (we have the same one) at it over the kitchen bloody table.

I shot out of the garden quicker than if it had been burglars but what do I do now? I think I should keep quiet and try to erase the image from my mind. I love SiLs DH, he is lovely and doesn't deserve this. Should I tell my DH? I just tipped the bloody window cleaner yesterday as well. SiL off to London tomorrow, I have to go over with presents zoo can't avoid her. I just know I will go bright red.

What should I do???

OP posts:
Original poster
sillysanta · 19/12/2011 15:31

She has told her best friend about her DH yesterday, she told her that her DH cheats all the time but she puts up with it! I think she told me out of desperation!

OP posts:
springydaffs · 19/12/2011 15:31

Is this for real?? It sounds like a carry on film.

FellatioNelson · 19/12/2011 15:31

So she volunteered all this to you by complete co-incidence? I don't think so. She realised you were there and she is thinking on her feet and doing an Oscar winning acting performance.

FellatioNelson · 19/12/2011 15:32

Or it's not true. One or tuther.

EnjoyResponsiblyIfSleighFlying · 19/12/2011 15:34

Ooooh good theory Fellatio.

Until the second OP post, I was laughing my head off at her outrage that she'd only just tipped him!

OP I'm with Fellatio, are you going to tell her you saw her on the table?

Original poster
sillysanta · 19/12/2011 15:35

But she's moving in this aft! Maybe she did see me but why move in?

OP posts:
Ilovepigs · 19/12/2011 15:39

Truly unbelievable.truly....

izzywhizzysmincepies · 19/12/2011 15:42

You have a window cleaner? Xmas Envy Can't get one where I live but I'm now wondering whether I'm offering the right inducements Xmas Hmm

So how much did you tip him and has his squeegee made the earth move for you too, or did it simply displace the cruet set on your kitchen table?

DashingRedhead · 19/12/2011 15:42

Lordy! Typical family Xmas eh? Keep us posted... Does your DH know about this yet?

PeppermintPasty · 19/12/2011 15:47

On a related note, my secretary used to go out with Robin Askwith, many moons ago. Funny old world.

Original poster
sillysanta · 19/12/2011 15:50

I tipped him a fiver, I hope he spent it on condoms!

OP posts:
PeppermintPasty · 19/12/2011 15:52

Bugger stupid link.Xmas Angry

FellatioNelson · 19/12/2011 15:55

I wonder how the charging works in these circumstances? Do you get the windows thrown in for free, or does he charge you extra for the deluxe package? I suppose it depends on the er...profile of each individual customer. Grin

TheTruthNothingButTheTruth · 19/12/2011 16:15

Its okay, too much drinking during Christmas time can make some people go off on their fantasies.

Original poster
sillysanta · 19/12/2011 16:17

Now I am mad!

The silly woman just called me and told me (very calmly) that she had decided to work on things with her DH. She apparently came to that decision in the last 30 mins, she would prefer it if I didn't mention this to anyone as her DH will realize she is having it off with the window cleaner would be mortified and they are going to try to put it all behind them.

I said "so you saw me when I was dropping the presents off then?" She denied knowing what I was talking about. Cue more tears and pleas to keep quiet as DH is in bits about his secretary etc. I hung up on her.

I AM going to tell DH, but not anyone else. It's none of my business, but I really hope fate bites the manipulative little madam on her backside.

I bought her a Jo Malone candle for christmas. I'm going to keep it and regift her the poundshop box of smellies my great aunt bought me for my birthday. Xmas Angry

OP posts:
QueenCess · 19/12/2011 16:23

Wow she thinks you're gullible doesn't she?

No posh candle will override the massive smell of bullshit wafting from her direction.....

cakeoclock · 19/12/2011 16:26

Oh I love a soap opera. This reminds me of my friends painfully shy dad who walked in one on of his lesbian clients having sex with the gas meter man.

I have no idea how stuff like this happens. I'm obviously sheltered.

TheSecondComing · 19/12/2011 16:33

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

izzywhizzysmincepies · 19/12/2011 16:57

What a load of old cod your SIL has told you. Her dh is 'in bits' over his secretary so she gets to work on the window cleaner's bits?

Jo Malone is definitely wasted on this devious madam - get her a bottle of Windolene. a Christmas card that's got a picture of a window on it, and a copy of George Formby's 'When I'm Cleaning Windows' for her dh.

Think of the mileage you can get out this and the fun you will have turning the conversation to 'windows' every time you get together
with your ILs.

When you next pay your SIL an imromptu visit perhaps you can time it to coincide with the arrival of the postman? Xmas Wink

craftyknickers · 19/12/2011 17:00

I'm sorry but I don't believe this one bit!

CotherMuckingFunt · 19/12/2011 17:29

Buy her a tin of tripe. Hopefully it will be on BOGOF and you can have one as well.

FellatioNelson · 19/12/2011 17:39

Why is it obvious that you would feel the need to name change for this OP? It's amazing - these type of threads are always from a 'first poster' or a supposed name-changer. It gets a bit tiresome and predictable to be honest.

eandz · 19/12/2011 17:44

whatever, i love this thread. keep posting :)!

MrsWembley · 19/12/2011 18:55

I have to say, I hope it's for real, coz that makes it sooooo much funnier.Grin

CandiceMariePratt · 19/12/2011 19:03

Where abouts are you? My dh is a window cleaner