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Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

oops I think i've really upset him this time :-(

33 replies

NannyNat · 24/11/2011 14:52

Ok so slightly funny story, was trying to do the tesco online shop this morning but couldnt remember the password (dp set it up) so i sent for a password reminder. Now i know my dp's e-mail password although i've never been on it before, so i thought i'd just quickly nip onto his e-mail to find out what i needed for tesco (i realise this is wrong) so i got slightly nosy about the fact he had thousands of e-mails, noticed one read one for a porn site and found out hes a premium member and has been having private naughty chats with women on there.
Well i was upset and rang him admitting i'd been on his e-mail and saying how sorry i was and that i'd never go on again i was just really upset that i'd seen this e-mail. Now he's really upset that i went on his e-mail, i wish i never had and i know how wrong it is. How do i make it up to him? Btw he is ill at the moment so sex is not a way lol

OP posts:
HoudiniHissy · 25/11/2011 20:44

Damn! Still no permission to get back into contact?

Flanelle · 25/11/2011 21:01

Give yourself permission, Houdini. No-one's choice but yours.

I'd have made a new account at Tesco too, and probably never have found out.

squeakytoy · 25/11/2011 21:06

I am almost lost for words...

The person who is supposedly faithful to you is having private chats of a dubious nature, yet YOU are wondering how to make it up to him...

Riiiiiiight.... :(

FabbyChic · 25/11/2011 21:25

Of course it isnt okay, Id leave someone for it.

My comment was to the fact she signed into his email, if that had of been me Id have set up another Tesco registration.

KoPo · 25/11/2011 22:27

Several thought here.

  1. Are you actually sure he has been paying for or genuinely subscribed to porn site? I ask this as i have a gender neutral email acct and have mails arrive in my inbox claiming to be from adult sites that I am supposedly a member of. (I know bloody well that Im not a member as I have an intense dislike of porn)

  2. If he is a genuine member of this porn site and is not paying to view it then is this an issue in your relationship?

  3. If he is paying for porn behind your back then he is disrespectful for spending money that could be much better used elsewhere.

  4. If the porn viewing is a problem to you then you need to work out how best to deal with that.

Stay calm and dont let your DP derail you by throwing the more minor thing about you viewing his email acct in the way of dealing with the bigger picture. I might be a little annoyed if my DH had been rummaging about in my email acct but not to the point of refusing to realise that there may be bigger things to deal with.

Good luck OP

Schnarkle · 25/11/2011 22:59

So run this by us again. Why are you apologising? You're sorry you caught him on porn sites having private chats. Ah its all clear now. Brew for all.

PenguinsAreThePoint · 26/11/2011 14:53

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

HoudiniHissy · 26/11/2011 15:45

Cheers Fabby! As I suspected! Grin damn! (not really)

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