"What attracts you most to your DP, will be the thing that causes the most irritation later on" Discuss

[smallnotfaraway]

I read this somewhere and have thought about it, and it seems in my case that yes, that is something of a truism!

For instance, you're most attracted to the fact that he/she is confidently flirtatious, but when you get together, this is the one thing which is a major annoyance and you'd wish he/she would stop doing it.

I wonder if anyone else has views on this? Will post and run - just idly wondered if anyone else has noticed this phonomenon...

Yep I was attracted to my exH because he was the life and soul of the party and he was so chatty to everyone however years later he still wanted to be out all the time till the early hours chatting to everyone but me

I was attracted to his care free attitude and no worrying what other people thought, as well as him not being hung up by being PC. Years later I realise that I like being PC, or rather inoffensive, I think worrying about what other people think makes you keep up standards and being care free actually means being fucking irresponsible.

Ardal O'Hanlon was in attendance at an Italian football match in the 1990s.

When the Football Italia channel 4 show returned after the half time adverts break, there was English presenter James Richardson holding up a couple of little models of footballers explaining to Ardal that they were 'small', but the players down on the pitch were 'far away'.

I think you might have something there- dh is strong and intelligent and high achieving, and sOmetimes now I feel feeble in comparison! And I know he liked my laidbackness and now it drives him crazy. Still love him though!

I was partly attracted to how passionate DH was. I'm not necessarily talking about sex although that too. He was interested in lots of things and could talk for hours about them. He was quite fiery and opinionated.

Those things do sometimes annoy me now. When I just want to relax at the end of a day with the dc's, I really don't want to listen to him wittering on in great detail about something that I've heard a million times before.

He still makes me laugh a lot though

You see, I sometimes worry that my dh will find the confident, impassioned women he fell in love with a bit annoying over time.

One word DRUMS

Dh ... Ah I remember falling in love with him because he was so kind and helpful...and good looking and funny and popular and he is a brilliant father ( to my now step kids).
He was even kind and helpful and respectful to his ex-wife (even though she shagged the fish van man when they were married ).

I decided he was a keeper when I saw him cleaning the loo !

My dh is near perfection , and I love him cause he's himself.

Don't think he will ever irritate me .( apart from stealing the duvet and sleeping with the window open , even in winter ).

.... Forgot the farting .

He farts with effort , iykwim?.

Never used to do that when we first started seeing each other.

That makes me go , then (

I married him because he is intelligent and has a really really strong character. My father is a very weak man and although I love him, I despise his weakness and that, I think, is why strength matters to me more than anything in a man.

It has, of course, bit me on the arse

Hecate I did the opposite. My father was strong and very controlling. DH was laid back and easygoing, and would do as he was told.

28 years later I realise my mistake. He still does as he is told, in that work says jump and he says "how high?". When the children were tiny he would never stand up for me to his mother and she had to always come first. When we had neighbour trouble I had to sort it out. I'm tired of being the only adult in our family. I want to be looked after for a change.

He's always going to "do it later" (only later never comes). He's late for everything. He says "it doesn't matter" when I'm upset about something really important.

I would like a time machine so I could go back to pre DH (with hindsight) :(

BelfastBloke tha's because Ardal O'Hanlon just is Fr Dougal ;)

Was also thinking of my ex-H, and how the thing that attracted me most was the fact that he was from the same cultural background as me (therefore he is like me and destined to be my partner! thought I, naively ) In fact, I ignored many various other signs that I should not be with this person, but ignored them because of this holy grail of finding someone who I thought would understand where I was coming from. In fact, at the end of the day, one of the few things we appeared to have in common was our cultural heritage. So in that case in particular, what I thought was a good thing turned out to be a pretty worthless measure (but I blame my youth and extreme inexperience). Obvious to others though.